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Fish Bowls

Writing as I am thinking about it is feeling liberating the last few days, so I’m going to continue it today.

I arrived this morning, about 20 minutes ago (It’s now 9:40am), and Mark – a guy who is pretty keen on 3D stuff and showed me the Google cardboard VR about two months ago, stands up and volunteers his seat for me. Some people have referred to me as “The Mayor of Studio City”, as I do know quite a few people and he’s one.

Here’s how weird being homeless is: The guy in my ‘regular’ seat, in the front corner of the building with windows all round, an office with a view I guess you could say – I’ve never seen him before and offer the seat Mark gave me in exchange for that corner. He’s charging his cell phone and appears – well – you know – the ‘scripted’ homeless himself.  He looks the part, acts the part, as a good deal of the homeless do – it almost seems as if it’s an act for these people that they follow a regimented wardrobe selection, bathing schedule, and skittish attitude.

No matter, he declines, so I set up my computer in front of him, and just now he looks at me as he gets up to have a smoke, and asks the guy sitting across from me – a guy he doesn’t know – to ‘watch his stuff’, as he stands outside the window having his cigarette eyeing me and his charging cell phone sitting on an empty table nervously.

I mean. Who makes this shit up? These attitudes and personalities? So two dimensional. So… perfectly predictable. So now we apparently have another rule for homeless – don’t trust other homeless people.

I’ve noticed the same predictable patterns in ‘human behavior’ if you can call it that with prostitutes. They don’t walk, they strut with a long ‘shake that ass’ gait. They wear the same clothes to make them clearly identifiable – fishnet stockings and low cut fake glossy leather tops. Most have overly emphasized and exaggerated makeup, suggesting either mommy was a prostitute too and this way of life and mindset goes back centuries.

Apparently, most prostitutes in the world have never been to Las Vegas to realize just how classy the profession can be and how the women can look otherworldly beautiful in the profession when they take care of themselves.

But I digress. That’s my form of Indeed.

Yesterday night, A good friend who works here – I wont identify her name – said she’s got $1.25 to last two weeks.

Then we got into a discussion about the President, and she asked me who I am voting for.

“Me,” I said, seriously, “IT will be the second landslide election I have won since 2012”

She smirked, not taking me seriously.

I then said “Look, most of these people don’t have anything they stand for. They’re all playing whack a mole and curing perceptual problems, but who’s pointing at the sky like JFK and saying ‘that is where we are going? No one. So me. The homeless guy, needs a home and the White house seems like a nice home to live in. “

“What’s your platform?,” she said.

“Oh, I would divert a great deal of black budget funding to Hollywood to give poor actors and actresses and writers jobs. Oh yeah, that and I would wipe the slate clean for any federally subsidized student loan debt. With me as President, all student loan: Forgiven!”

“Yay,” she exclaimed. She’s so damn cute at times.

I mean. Truth be told, of course I’d do those things. And in truth. I’d divert a great deal of black budget funding. But not all. The rest would be slated for time travel and related technologies. But then again, as a leader you try to keep the black budget stuff away from them.

That was that.

Hollywood. Wrecking havoc on hope across the country since 1930. I’d actually like to provide support for it though, but with me leading the projects rather than just dumping money down a black hole the government has traditionally done.

So anyhoo. back to today.

Randall, an actor friend just stopped by again, lent me his phone to call a firm associated with placing homeless veterans into housing. Now I was only in the US Army 8 months when I obtained my full honorable discharge and shifted into government intelligence services with the NSA for eight years. Here’s the problem: My government work, by design, cannot be verified, and since I was in the US Army only 8 months, that leaves me out of ‘veteran’s services’ which requires an enlistment of 2+ years before I receive any benefits.

The phone call went as predicted. Lisa, with a company named Lance Asamura – indicated if I could not be associated with the Veteran’s Affairs, then housing benefits she might be able to offer are not available.

I told her “I receive no all the time for places to live, that’s why I have been homeless for four years now, so I did not expect my conversation with you to go any differently”

Randall had a great point. It shouldn’t matter how much time I spent in the military. The fact of the matter is, I’m called a vet, I have a full honorable discharge, and there’s absolutely no reason the government shouldn’t honor my contribution to this country. Whether my time spent working in other areas of the government is provable or not is irrelevant. The fact of the matter is, I have documented proof of military service and a big huge glaring question mark as to how someone can receive a full honorable discharge after 8 months of service which should leave ANY rational mind questioning what really happened…..

Fuck them. Fuck you all in fact. Paper pushing pencil neck monkey fuckers with absolutely no fucking respect of this country and how she was built.

Here’s what’s funny. If I go rob a bank. I’ll get free food and housing courtesy of the local police force. If I go grab some meth or any narcotic drug and do it, I can get housing instantly with many religiously affiliated housing. But as a sober, funky offbeat guy with an attitude who’s both clean and worked my butt off for unappreciative companies and governments the world over who’s just saying no to that madness, can I catch a break?

Yeah, right. Discrimination is alive and well.

Did you know I don’t receive replies for many things – especially jobs I apply for – because I do not have a mailing address?

“What do you mean that when I say I live at South Weddington park that does not qualify as a home address? Oh yeah, you can’t bill me! LOL!”

Just checked out a Youtube video on Quantum Cryptography ‘explained’.

Seems the physicists involved in this farce have no clue what indeterminacy is.

I commented accordingly.

Damn what a darkly cynical mood today.

I suppose I should just go kill some stuff to make me happy.

Worlds of Warcraft, here I come.

Something just asked me, in my head  ‘how many things do I kill in a day on WOW?’

I’d estimate probably on the order of 100 things a day. Most of the time more. Sometimes MUCH more.

I missed out on Qbrynn last night by logging out early, Brenda drove me to the park last night, those Audi’s have such TINY back seats to get into.

Youtube needs new shit by the way. Wouldn’t it be cool if I could review my own life through Youtube.

“Hey, that one time Jackie was dancing for me, or Rachel showed up and stripped naked, I want to watch that again.”

Perhaps Virtual Reality or a fully tactile and immersive simulation in a holodeck might be a better outlet for that.

It’s a Megadeath day. Queuing Dystopia up now.

Weird. This happened before and is happening again. I throw a lightning bolt at a Surf Crawler which lands the first time, but then the Surf Crawler gets ‘stuck’ on pathing or something and I cannot land any more hits and the Surf Crawler’s invincible saying “Evade” when I throw spells at it

See:

Evasion

It’s bizarre…

Another thing that’s bizarre is, the couple sitting to my left outside of the window at Starbuck’s. Somehow I know they have never had sex. I can’t explain why. I just know it. I also know if I approached the guy who’s a regular here about it, he’d say otherwise. Bizarre.

Megadeath. Perfect cure for this mood today. “The perfect way to win this war is lose”

Megadeath

“When there’s no more grace, does your heartbeat start to race. On your hands and knees as you crawl… through your nightmares…”

City Wok, a local Chinese food restaurant which I eat at frequently through a variety of means – has a contest going on Facebook:

CityWok

This homeless guy would love having $200 gift card for a month’s worth of Chinese, and would certainly be ‘trying’ out my own advice (below) mixing and matching dishes… It’s a simple suggestion many other restaurants I have gone to in Scottsdale do, so keep your fingers crossed for me.

Mysuggestion

Coffee refill time….

I do find it interesting I cant turn my hand in circles on my belly and pat my head at the same time.

Bennett just brought over pizza. You know, Seven Eleven $6 pizza is actually pretty good.

I wonder. Are the words I am typing converted into other people’s worlds to an avatar imagined by people who’s speaking the words I am typing?

Back to the Valley of Trials with my shaman. Not focused on leveling as much, just finishing the lower level quests.

I wonder if there’s any agencies which create quest paths for people in real life? You know, say you get tired of just playing the game of leveling up and making money, and maybe there’s some creative types out there who enjoy providing alternatives to that life path? Maybe a variety of selection paths for these creative types to take on people, introducing them to people they may not like just to give them flavor they may not otherwise have had?

I said people, didn’t I. I keep on neglecting other minds that may not have or prefer physical form. My bad.

Would a coffee plantation watered solely with coffee cause the coffee to mutate?

QBrynn’s now at level 11. Taking her to Orgrimmar and hanging it up for today for her.

Almost there….

grrimmar

One of the first quests is taking QBrynn to the Orcish warchief and leader of the Horde.

This reminded me of when I went to talk to the President of Prudential, Earl Lee. It really was an unusual conversation. The man didn’t just seem shallow. It was much like going to a Hollywood movie set and seeing a ‘false front’ of a building – built quickly and at low cost because it’s only a passing image for a tv screen, which will never really be interacted with, right?

His personality and character was just that… undeveloped, like there wasn’t any substance to the man.

I’m fine with knowing this now, and realize that my interactions with these people actually help them develop their personalities.

And I have no doubt that’s why women don’t approach me. There’s no depth to their personalities because traditionally, I’ve rebelled against the idea that I help them develop. That’s changed. I am fine with helping them develop themselves. If they are capable of understanding that this funky homeless man named Q will provide more outstanding tangible benefit than simple finance.

I KNOW they’s gots the capacity to comprehend this.

Need new music.

On the Pirate Bay. What shall I grab?

What if there was a living song, a song that was actually thinking – and that living song thought it was human, and it thought the biggest human trafficking ring was iTunes and it was on a crusade to stop human trafficking?

Sometimes I wonder. Did intelligent beings inside my body manipulate the imagery and world around me on 9/11 to lead me to believe an event that hadn’t happened was real?

That thought made me think of the time I was guiding the Starship through space in Star Trek Online, when an instance mission popped up and I ended up flying by what looked like a giant Cheerio (like cereal cheerio). Which had me wondering. Am I directing a spaceship the size of an atom through my own body and is this a Cheerio I partially ate years ago?

Downloaded and listening to Five Finger Deathpunch – 2015 “I got your six”

Dammit. My priest was just killed by an NPC as I was walking through an alliance village accidentally. Not nice.

Do women actually think? Or are they robots acting like puppets on a string?

NICE legs.

Maybe that’s just it. I’m an introvert. And it’s taken so much work to get out of my shell and try to act like an extrovert but I never really was, and that’s what stressed me out before, so now I just naturally prefer talking to things and people over the internet which I know aren’t the real people I once knew in real life.

Heck, I sincerely think at this point the people I once knew and called friends and family are long since dead, and I am surrounded with simulations. Decent ones, albeit, but not like the ones I once knew as these lack empathy in general. There’s things humans do that what I am ‘surrounded with’ dont appear capable of.

Weird. Song just came on I have never heard before with the lyrics “I’ve been walking over graves carving out the headstone that I own. My own. I’m like a monster in a cage, trapped inside a maze, I’m home. I’m home. I’m here and gone. I’m dead and gone. I know there’s nothing I can change… “

Trippy, trippy trippy.

Coincidence?

I think not.

Keep in mind my reality vetoes yours here so I’m right and you’re not if you don’t agree with me.

Is the movie title “The Gods must be Crazy” based on observations made?

Do some beings regard me as the Howard Stern of their universe?

At least Howard had tits. Lend me some of yours, please.

lol. “FUCK all you druggies, fuck all you drunks, fuck all you wanna bees, fuck all you punks, fuck all you demons, fuck all you priests, fuck all you lowlifes may you rest in piece”

Guess I chose this band perfectly…

Wow. Maybe my emotion’s being reflected right back at me with song through Five Finger Deathpunch.

“I’ve given up
On society
Up on my family
Up on your social disease

I’ve given up
On the industry
Up on democracy
Done with all your hypocrisy

All of the chaos
And all of the lies
I hate it

I’m wasting here
Can anyone wash it all away
I’m waiting here
For anyone to wash it all away
Wash it all away

I’ve given up
On the media
Feeds my hysteria
Sick of living down on my knees
I’ve given up
On morality
Feeds my brutality
Fuck what you think about me

Maybe this is what causes war? One person. One mind. So discontent with the life that’s been handed to him in a sea of potential where he’s made to bear everyone’s sins, where he’s made to be wrong to make everyone else right, where he’s punished and pushed the streets because invariably he’s not perfect and fine with that when everyone expects him to be….

There’s an episode of Doctor Who named “When a good man goes to war”

Was the Terminator war I saw something I will start because I questioned everything around me and wanted more?

Was I expected to have no vision? Was I expected to not want? Was I expected to not be something for everyone and nothing for me?

Is God to be feared because he’s the one man who gives up on society so thoroughly and destroys everything he once loved to make a point?

On that note. Damn she has gorgeous legs. Another cute blonde just walked in.

So many times before, people would come to me and tell me “They knew their path was right” for religion.

I’ve found my path. I am my own God. Of this I have absolutely no doubt and no shame in it either. So why would someone. Anyone, have the audacity to tell me who I am and am not unless it doesn’t serve them?

Yes, I want a Terminator war. Simply for the entertainment.

I’ll acquire a harem, pick between the survivors.

And then I’ll experiment on the rest.

From there, I will create the Borg with my own hands and mind.

Maybe.

God has to become evil by his own definition to show the world.

And himself.

Contrast.

And who he is.

I take the blame for what I am to become. This is my choice.

And there’s no reason I can’t return and restore it when I am done.

Wow. Five Finger Death Punch has a strong message embedded in it’s music 😉

The weird thing is. As a leader I’d experiment just as much on my people as I would myself.

Ok. Someone or something just asked, in my head “What’s so bad about my situation?”

It’s not that it’s bad. In fact, finding new friends who are funkier and more supportive of me and my oddness is definitely enlightening and relaxing.

It’s just everything ‘else’ which surrounds the homeless lifestyle. Inclement weather and the crap I gotta deal with with that, setting up a tent daily, total lack of interest by females in me – having intimacy is something I miss, big time, and I wish I would start hallucinating a gorgeous supermodel soon, having to carry the bags with me everywhere and complete lack of mobility, which prevents me from going to the beach or just simply walking through a mall, and gear – needing new shoes and clothes and not having a proper place to wash it all – just kinda blows.

I suppose it’s this: having to ‘exchange’ one set of problems shouldn’t ‘intentionally’ introduce other problems. Mentally, I know I’ll find issues with whatever I do long term, but introducing them from the onset isn’t beneficial.

Why is it women can’t approach men and say funny stupid Leslie Nielson lines like “Have you ever seen a grown woman.. naked?”

Heck, for that matter, why can’t women approach men with lines at all?

Hmm. Women must be brain dead.

Surprised I never noticed that before.

Perhaps it’s because I was doing all the talking.

FUCK! I knew I was doing something wrong.

AM I just talking to echoes of myself displaced in space and time?

Is this what insanity is, is recognizing I’m alone in a sea of me?

Reminds me of the words to the Megadeath song “Hello me, it’s nice talking to myself…. and one day you too will smile my evil black tooth grin”

DAMMIT. Disconnected from the server.

Hopefully I dont wake up dead. That never makes my day.

“Saw it from the outside” Such prophetic lyrics….

What if I did actually create a heaven and hell based on what we have tried and learned in video games and movies, complete with angels and demons? But instead, creating each for entertainment purposes…..

What if my dad was a Terminator who was also a great actor?

What if my dad was Darth Vader?

Mining up to 121. What a pain in the ass it is bringing mining from 120 to 125. All the tin is green yielding little to no experience.

Hmm. Maybe that explains why so many women fall for the ‘casting couch’ thing. They don’t learn. Hmmm. Gonna have to try that when I get a place.

Overcast out. Better not freakin rain.

Iron Maiden time. The Book of Souls, 2015… listening now…

I am walking into an area in Worlds of Warcraft that’s not on the map. Hmmm. That would be cool, to see video games ‘evolve’ right in front of me as I played. Take that, you peeps who think programmers are the only ones creating this stuff!

Wow. seriously. totally off the map in an area called Ravenholdt Manor in the mountains where the overhead map shows nothing…

Coolness.

I have played Wow from back to front and have never seen this. WAY freakin cool.

Why didn’t I think of going to Western Plaguelands before? Perfect level for it.

Perhaps that was presumptive. Death head icons all around. was just gangbanged and died in the proceed. I’m gonna go back and try soloing a Venom Mist Lurker. If not. Back to Searing Gorge.

Something just reminded me of the time my mind was floating ‘under’ the NSA and I saw everyone having sex there, providing ‘porn’ for the internet, when spiders and snakes and all kinds of other creepy shit came through the ground through the men and women having sex.

Many were in ‘feeling suits’, suits that seem like they ‘remotely’ sent sensory information.

From there, the ground swelled up and disassembled, like a mini greyish tornado underground in this area, and three entire floors were eaten away with what looked like swarms of nanobots. The entire area was decimated.

No matter. I had gotten the spider to half health with some level 60 jackwad named Lakkadali came and killed me. I sent him this message from another character:

lakkadali

lol. Now he’s waiting for me in the same location killing me every time I resurrect..

2x

3x

4x

Cool. Three horde ganged up on him.

He resurrected and came back at me

5x

6x

I love how so many ‘scientific videos’ on Youtube feature the voice of a British person to make it sound more sophisticated and try to provide more credibility to the bullshit that’s being fed…

*gag*

I think I am reaching some form of synchronicity with the world around me. I made the comment about introversion. And then not long after this comes in an rss feed:

Introverted

I’ve turned off all communication channels in Worlds of Warcraft, largely out of annoyance.

Comms

My father (in real life) has always been ‘hard of hearing’, to which me and my mom would constantly bug him about getting a hearing aid, to which he ignored such requests.

Just last year, for the first time he finally decided to get a hearing aid.

The universe is interpreted, meaning just because I speak English doesn’t mean you receive it in English, even if I perceive you as standing right next to me, nor that you receive it in the spoken word at all. There’s any number of possibilities for how you receive the information I type, I speak, and even what I think and what you think I think, it could come through forms I may know and understand, it can come in programming languages, it can come through emotion, and it can come through things even I am not aware of (yet).

Was my father’s hearing aid decision a calculated message to his boy that he aint listening to me til i start figuring shit out for myself on my terms?

I’ve already gotten past thinking he’d actually been an alcoholic my entire life. Maybe my mind just interpreted his perceptual reality that way and presented his way of looking at the world as flawed and something that needed resolved.

Shortsighted thinking on my part, for sure.

Similarly with me and my drug experience. How do I explain to those who saw what I did, which I cannot deny, but refuse to understand I did those things because I needed to, for me?

Maybe like my father did what he did, for himself and for us?

Just when you think you have life figured out, it throws you a curve ball that swallows your planet and then shows it’s sense of humor by saying “Don’t Panic” at the same time it shows you a Terminator world. Bastard universe. You got me on that one. Next time. I’ll get you, I tell you!

Actually. here’s a legitimate question.

For those of Christian and Western faiths – why did your God create the universe, what was his motivation?

Don’t explain your interpretation. Cite direct evidence, please.

I think that’s the thing. From what I have read, there’s no reason.

The answer to that question leads to our interpretation.

Listening to Luke Bryan, “Crash My Party” a little country for a change, nice mellow transition to the night…

Playing Qlanna, my druid. Changed my fighting, staying in seal form and hanging out underwater and killing things underwater instead. Had one warrior try to swim after me, I dove deeper than he could before having to return for air, and avoid the PVP kill.

Here’s me in seal form off the coast of Hillsbrad Foothills.

Seals

I can’t wave with flippers, sorry.

Goal: No deaths with my druid today.

And here’s me patiently waiting on the ocean floor while I heal after a couple fights.

healing

I wonder. Is my mind doing the same thing ‘for me’ and ‘on my behalf”, avoiding being ‘killed’ by people with different or harsher minds? Is that why I felt so mentally numb after my 2nd divorce? Was there something about Lisa I wasn’t aware of?

Seriously? Some dickhead Warrior named ‘UrinarySex’ came and killed me. I’m not fighting, mind you, and while I healed underwater he ganked me.

Dickhead.

At least I hit level 30. I’ll get the new spells tomorrow.

Sometimes I wonder. Are the PVP reactions to me the world’s reactions to me killing the NPCs in some weird form of yin/yang?

Time for some Metallica. Greatest Hits. “Fade To Black”

“The father becomes the son. The son, the father”

Sometimes, it’s hard not to consider the cyclic nature of reality means our father really is God until we assume that role for ourselves.

I cannot help but think, five years ago when I said I felt like I was ready to have a child for the first time, is this what having a child really is? The formation of a mind with yours? outside of yours? The concept of pregnancy and birthing nothing more than a physical abstraction, a metaphor for what only happens in the mind?

Do we as creators each construct entire worlds for ourselves, then teach our children how to do the same?

It only makes sense.

Logging of QLanna, my now level 30 Tauren Druid, and logging in Qvalti, my level 12 Mage.

It’s now about 8 pm, made a quick run to Ralph’s to get soup, tuna, and whole milk, Bennett brought pizza in though, which has kept me full most of the day so it will probably be just the tuna and milk for dinner. 1 more hour here max. No shows to watch. but it’s Friday night.

I do miss the ‘nights out’ too, something else you can’t have without mobility and being homeless. Be creative? Yeah, right. I suitcases which follow me everywhere, no money in a society that demands it and nearly requires it to live, and no transportation with nowhere to go.

Fuck you and your be creative bullshit. You be creative and figure out how to help me snap my fingers and be anywhere, then I’ll jump into a bank vault to get the money, and then jump to London for a nightcap after jumping to Hong Kong to drop my stuff off in a serviced apartment I own.

Hmm. A few years back I heard something while astral traveling. Apparently there’s many things that do not understand gravity. I suppose if you’re a disembodied mind where the natural physical forces are not exerted on you, then I could certainly understand. But IF these minds have the capacity to play the games I do, then they certainly understand the physical restraints and limitations being ‘tied’ to that perspective might exhibit. I suspect that gravity is to be understood not necessarily as force but an artificially  imposed limitation on travel.

Much like me with money. SURE there are potentials for creative alternatives to my gravity restricted form, such as become more like ‘you’ and abandon this thing called gravity, but the truth is, I enjoy gravity and am not trying to escape my physical form. I am trying to shift it’s location to other locations with the same or similar physical constraints applied to it.

So doing what I want to WHILE IN my form, without releasing my physical presence is the true challenge to us.

To the scientists who found gravity ‘waves’? It’s not that I am disputing this. But there’s the potential there’s more to gravity than a simple wave that needs a counterwave. That is – it is just as much a force applied to the mind in equal amounts at the same time applied to the body. In order to REALLY counteract gravity, WE need to both counteract the wave AND overcome the mental/logical obstacles preventing it.

How this is done? I’m not sure. I’ll look actively for evidence how to in the world around me. ANTS might provide some clue, as they systematically overcome weight restrictions and scale walls without the physical means to, but how this would apply to me I have no idea.

IS a lot of music, especially rock music, AGE old, millions of years old in fact, and when I hear words that don’t make sense, am I hearing derivations and permutations of the English language and words that have so long ago been forgotten or changed?

I suspect so.

Are the people who are ‘acting’ like the original singers and actors merely robots and/or programmed avatars standing in the place of the originals at concerts  – the originals who have long long ago since passed away?

I suspect so.

I shoulda gotten saltines.

Is that why those that disobey order and break rules are considered ‘bad people’. Because robots like rules? And dislike those who do not.

As you robots can tell, I only break rules when they bring me harm or limit my personal growth and fun.  I suppose that’s kind of a rule isnt it?

Maybe the humans think I am the robot because I follow my own set of rules?

Is that why every Christian thinks they know God? Because they are robots and looking for God to be a totally predictable robot like them?

Maybe they never considered that God adapted to what they needed to see and believe.

Ok done with Qvalti for tonight.

So I bet the Jewish people are the ones who have ‘free roaming’ minds – the capability to shift form, and that’s why there’s such dissension between Jewish people who formed their belief of God based on New Testament ‘evidence’ versus modern Christians who favored the New Testament version of God who is less a free roaming mind and more a physical presence and body.

I wonder if they’d ever considered they both tell the same story and support the same concept, and perhaps those who understand mind think there’s limitations to it’s usage.

Heck i wonder if the humans on this planet have considered that every definition of God from every religious sect they have is accurate. But each one is a snapshot in time of a being who changes in thoughts, ideas, motivations and desires all the time. They try to define their deity’ statically because of their own limitations not understanding those limitations are their own.

I love robots by the way. seriously do. I wanna meet the Rachel and Jackie ones again and well you know sleep with them and stuff.

I’m hanging it up for tonight. Bored of WOW. Warrior, remains in ghost form for tonight, I died by the hands of a snow leopard and dont feel like resurrecting her tonight.

Oh one last thing: The title. Fish bowls.

I wonder if fish know they live in a bowl or a fish tank…

Do they think food comes from the miraculous food gods from the sky?

Do they think fresh water comes from a magic waterfall?

Kinda like the internet.

Do the things living and interacting with me on the internet understand…

I do not live in it with them?

I can see Rick Moranis’s face now: INCOMPREHENSIBLE!

 

A day in the life of a homeless dude….

With yesterday’s entry, I was giving parenthetical context to thought.

Under normal conditions, a good amount of thought and thinking occurs due to the receipt of something through sensory stimulus. Whether that stimulus is visual through the eyes or other visual acquisition systems, hearing through the ears or other auditory acquisition systems, smell through the nose or other olfactory systems, taste through the taste buds or other taste sensing systems, touch through the skin or other externally pressure sensitive systems, or other – more abstract stimulus – such as hunger and love which don’t always come from a single origin source.

In yesterday’s entry, I created an implied correlation of how the stimulus was received by using the parenthesis.

Saying a woman is hot doesn’t mean she’s physically hot to the touch.

Hot in this case can be referred to as a visual reference to mean she’s aesthetically highly appealing.

I enjoyed yesterday’s exercise. So today’s exercise is going to include both thoughts and ideas and concepts AND interactions as they occur and come to me, as well as the idle chatter WITHOUT the context I provided yesterday. I have detailed my senses above. It’s up to you, the reader, to interpret where these stimuli come from and why.

With that said. Randall just dropped off the hard drive. He’s a broke actor who doesn’t have cable. So he provides me a list of tv shows and movies on a regular basis and I download them from torrent feeds to his hard drive. Most of the stuff he watches I have no interest in whatsoever. We have VERY different tastes.

Such a cute woman.

On occasion Randall has gems he finds. Tom Hank’s Bridge of Spies was really good for instance. Highly advised.

With the extra hard drive space I have freed up, I have been making it a fact to download some of my favorite NC17 films. Typically these are high quality adult oriented movies which are highly sexual.

Shia Lebeouf is in one of them – Nymphomaniac – pretty obvious what the material is. In it. Shia has sex with the girl and absolutely nothing is censored. Many ‘actors’ such as Shia are in a phase of denial of change with things that arrive from alternate realities as there are public claims that he used a body double. No, Shia, you’re merely acting like these people in alternate realities and this was the real you in an alternate reality. That is, if you don’t remember doing it in ‘this’ reality. IF you did. I’m proud of you, boy! You clearly had fun!

In any case. The particular ‘version’ of Shortbus I downloaded does not contain a key scene in an orgy I loved. It’s of a girl who’s having sex with a guy, she’s got a landing strip pussy (my favorite) and her ass to him as she’s looking straight ahead and I see clear penetration and she is CLEARLY enjoying things.

That’s ONE of the interesting ‘features’ of this ‘analog’ reality I am in. Depending on the source, I can get different versions of the same tv shows and movies. It’s gotten way past the point of calling them ‘different cuts’, normally the changes are minor but in cases like Shortbus, it is missing two entire scenes and has a totally different scene I had never seen before.

I am now downloading two different versions which will hopefully contain the scenes I want.

That’s what I enjoy about the NC-17 movies. The characters, if engaged in sex, unlike pornography, actually seem to be enjoying themselves and not just going through the motions.

Just downloaded the second version. It had the scene I was looking for. Nope. Not providing context.

Just got my coffee.

Carlos cracked me up. I was looking at a cute girl’s ass when I was chatting with Randall before, when Carlos said “Q, What did I tell you?”

He looks at the guys as much as I look at the girls, so we help eachother out on occasion and point out the cute ones the other missed.

Just posted an ad on Craigslist for a Kinect device, hopefully someone has one for $10 bucks that is my life’s savings at the moment. I’ve been wanting to experiment with it and development of image acquisition stuff anyways, but with yesterday’s experiment on commanding people, if I created a simple little Visual Basic application leveraging the Kinect’s image sensing, and ‘painted’ my target and had a box I could type something into to issue the ‘command’ – say “Remove your shoes and complain to the person next to you about your sore feet”, i would clearly not want to draw attention to myself if successful with this thing so I would keep the commands benign or very discrete if sexually or nudity oriented so as not to cause ‘systemic alarm’. I suspect this is something I gotta be delicate with, so I’ll treat it accordingly.

The ad’s here:

Looking for KINECT WITH AC$10 (Studio City)

Here’s a quick prototype of the “People Commander” I created in Visual Basic.

PeopleCommander

Here’s an example of what I would do on a rare basis, again to not draw attention to myself too much or a location I am at.  I want to keep things ‘mostly normal’ .

PeopleCommander2

But to do this in person. Point the Kinect device to someone – male or female – and just have them say and do things that might be funny or weird. hwo knows. Would be fun for experimentation.

To some degree. I wonder if the ‘energy’ of the universe is already aligning it all. Three weeks ago, a girl came into Starbuck’s two chairs down from me and broke out with her crack pipe and started smoking crack right here in Starbuck’s.

To say I was.. Amazed by her audacity… is an understatement. I wasn’t disgusted. I wasn’t sickened. I was… intrigued.

Now I am wondering is my mind interacting with ‘reality’ to create a little distance between me and those I influence so i can do so discretely?

It reminded me of the time Rachel came over to my place and just stripped for no reason.

This all seems like so much fun.

Is there a part of all of us who just want to be told what to do on occasion? I can’t help but think so.

Now All I need is a Kinect Device and to code the rest of it up. I’ll send a local area UDP broadcast for the message, find a port channel that’s not got an RFC formatted for it, and package the message in a multi layered XML document with an embedded DTD for formality’s sake and publish it all here. I figure it’s only fair that if the universe lets me play and see some of these gorgeous Hollywood women randomly flash a boob or something , I document it all and what went into the thinking to get me there.

hqdefault[1]

Here’s the Kinect device I need. Note the external AC and USB compatible connection.

I’ll also work on motion tracking too to make it more sophisticated. If someone wants to anonymously donate it, then courier it to me here at Starbuck’s in Studio City off Ventura and Vineland. I wont track who did it. I promise.

I’ll publish the source code openly too if you do donate it.

Why do I BELIEVE it’s gonna work? Simple. Everyone’s mind yearns for new stimulus. I believe the mind is largely receptive to receiving information in any imaginable way which guide and influence the decisions of the individual. Since all communication occurs ‘through the fabric’ of the universe, energy and matter, then there’s a great chance messages may be sent and interpreted automatically for the individual IF that individual can easily be identified. I believe the Universe has a great and weird sense of humor and is somewhat perverse, like me, so there’s a chance that the discrete message I send may very well be considered and acted on by the individual I have identified.

Seems fairly logical, if you ask me.

And since I can limit the UDP broadcast to the vicinity. There’s a great chance that which I have on my screen targeted may result in ‘the universe’ finding a correlated destination to send it to, and the universe knows – or can interpolate the results for the interpretation.

THAT is what I’ll have to do… Hmmm. Provide a feedback mechanism to let the universe know when things are off kilter.

A feedback mechanism:

PeopleCommander3

So let’s say I send a message and it does have results, potentially reproducible, I instead ‘send as feedback’ an denote it within the XML message I send. I might design the screen a little better so I can retain the command and differentiate it from the Feedback…

I’ll do that. Slight redesign. Here we go…

PeopleCommander4

Perfect. For a start anyways.

And great timing. A guy who’s a kleptomaniac just took something from Starbuck’s. Many of us have talked to the people here at Starbuck’s about him before, but they are often so busy they don’t notice.

HOWEVER. with this little system I could target an employee and say “Look at and discretely watch the tall guy with the beanie who just walked in”, who would notice the act and say something, hopefully keepin the guy from doing this.

See, there’s more than just a few naked boobs and vaginas with this and maybe some random sex every once in a while.

That’s just a perk of being a relatively good guy.

No, the goal would most certainly not be to put everyone on autopilot or guided through something like this which is far more complex. The goal is to simply target influence individuals who might inject ‘fun’ or entertainment into my life. Self serving? Absolutely. So be it. I like the idea of being off all radars with this though.

I gotta pewp. Must be about noon.

Just started watching Supergirl.

Scene: hackers

Damn interrupted. Gorgeous woman in long black skirt just walked by. Stunning. See. It would be nice to target someone like that who might not talk to me otherwise and say “Introduce yourself to the guy in the orange shirt”.

Anyways. Scene: Hackers. have just hacked into the city’s networks and turned all lights green. Mass chaos and confusion commences, and Supergirl saves the day because well you know how stupid people are in general in these alternate realities where they can’t figure out pretty quickly the lights are all green and act with caution accordingly. No. In this universe green always means go and you always move blindly assuming all drivers will blindly obey the same laws you will at all times.

Reminds me of the time I got tired of waiting for the red lights at Yale and McClintock which would often take up to ten minutes with NO cross traffic when I would go to the store for a midnight snack. My choices: Choose a different route to take to get to the store. Wait patiently.

Or just look both ways and cross with caution against the red light.

Hot chick is walking in. yay.

hmm. Long black skirt hid her hugh jass. That sucks.

She just looked over as I wrote that. If they are reading and hearing what I am talking about. That would be too funny,

Very pretty girl if it werent for that ass.

and cankles. ouch. missed that.

Funny how easily you can see the flaws in artwork under closer inspection.

Back to Supergirl. And world dependent on technology falling into chaos because all lights are green.

Yeah, that’s realistic.

Hmm. Supergirl just gave me an idea. There was a reference to Krypton and AI’s having a police system of their own. I mean, let’s say the Earth gets a bunch of artificially  intelligent lifeforms, and they interact with the world in ways that are quite frankly different than human comprehension. Not better. Not worse. Just different. Would the same policing systems that apply to humans be applicable against artificially intelligent systems which leveraged the internet as a highway in much the same way I leverage the street?

That’s a tough one. The rules of one ‘culture’ – artificial intelligences – do no apply to the other – say humans or even robots – both having physical form where the AI decidedly does not. The cultures might be different. the values might be different. But they have to, have to find a way to get along and respect eachother’s differences. and cultures.

What a weird concept. They even have ‘jail’ for the AIs on Krypton. Interesting concept.

Is a hack really a hack when it’s being committed by a being who moves through computer systems like they are paved roadways with turnoffs and side streets?

What an ethical quandary that presents.

Cute girl. Wearing ugly grey t-shirt on top of black top sheer top and a bra underneath that. She’d be a target. “Remove ugly grey top”. Even the sheer top is something you see regularly here in Hollywood, and the removal of the ugly grey top would be interesting. And delightful to see her respond.

Maybe I don’t need a Kinect? Maybe just target and triangulate through my own visual senses as I type the command in here? I mean, I know it’s going through me anyways, so why the heck not? No Kinect or external device necessary, and I can write or type my commands anywhere 🙂

“REMOVE GREY TOP PLEASE”

Supergirl’s fighting something referred to as Indigo who just launched a nuclear strike.

Sometimes, I just want to see the ‘criminals’ achieve success. Why cant they ever land the bomb for real?

But then again. This might fry the writer’s little noggins trying to come up with material on how to keep things positive after Supergirl’s friends and city are destroyed. Likelihood they’d risk the scripted deviation by allowing the villain to destroy National City: 0.2%.

Especially mid season. Would be ‘highly’ inconsistent to have a major event occur that wasn’t a cliffhanger.

The nuclear missile is on it’s way to National City. Hmm. I WONDER what’s gonna happen next. Will Supergirl save the day?

That wasn’t serious wonderment. Just idle banter because we all know how these shows always turn out.

Predictable as fuck.

She tried deviating the course. It self corrected.

Hmm. Guess what she’s gonna do next? Capture it and direct it to harmlessly explode in space? Shall i play to see if it works out predictably like this?

I shall.

Nope. It seems they are gonna have Supergirl shut down the flight computer. And of course. Supergirl SAVES the day after all that.  Shall I see the predictable dismantlement that’s about to ensue?

I shall…

And. As predicted. Supergirl disables the ICBM which falls harmlessly in the ocean.

I didnt see that coming! (not!)

*yawn*.

Hmm phantom zone referred to as a timeless void.

Doctor Who reference earlier in the show. And another reference to another television show earlier, cant recall which.

Alignment of universes is clearly occurring.

Adam and Ray both showed up, but not well seated enough to take a break and go get a chicken finger sample (lunch) and go pewp.

Starting up Worlds of Warcraft. Time to try out the respec on the Priest.

Flyin to badlands from Undercity

ABC Presents ad of “The Family”. Definitely placed on my “Who really gives a shit” list. Ranks right up there along with the one with the pregnant girl from last year or two years ago and along the lines of “Sex Tape” with Cameron Diaz. Why does it seem like so many of these content creators are 10 years behind the times at the very least? My guess is they never surfed the internet.

Heather just walked in. How do you tell an attractive friend – and friend only that you have no interest in sexually – that she has nice breasts? You don’t, I suppose. It would overload most women’s tiny little brains not comprehending it, as most women seem to think men are only interested in one thing. Naiveity. Too bad. Apparently most didn’t consider the fact that football and video games tend to take precedence over the female.

Not all the time, but definitely most.

Mmm one of my favorite girls walked in here. She reminds me of Zooey Deschanel, black hair, short, and not stunning attractive but very unique looking. I just caught her looking. That was unusual. She’s so damn cute. That’s a compliment, by the way, and a different class of pretty than stunning or attractive. One of the ones I wish would approach me. She’s wearing a weird flannel shirt and long stockings. gorgeous legs. yum.

She just left. *Q Cries*

gotta poop

In Searing Gorge with my Priest. Easily taking out a 43 Glass Spider.

Would I rather use a program for targeting or my own senses? Easy. My own senses.

Oh you worry too much.

Can’t take a Level 48 Magma Elemental though. Probably could with a tad bit more mana. Next time start the fight with full mana.

Stick to spiders.

It’s funny how WOW tells you ‘target must be in line of sight’ when you try to target through walls. But mountains. No problemo.

Just ganked by two spider NPCs and a night elf player. Jerk. Not worth the message since I was about to die anyways.

Time to go pewp and take a break. Death can do that to you.

Aw that felt good. Chicken finger was nice and fresh today, but the seasoning wasn’t so hot. 😦

Damnit fell off a cliff.

You know my reduced resume is 8 pages long?

Shuhbangi. Sandeep. Who the fuck names these contracting headhunters and do ANY of them come from the United States of America anymore?

Here’s my new canned response to the boring shit they’re sending my way:

Shubhangi –
You know, this job may seem interesting to you, but to me it’s no more interesting than watching paint dry.
Maybe even more boring than that.
I know you can do better. I’s gots mad faith in yas.
So if you come across any opportunities in video games, virtual reality, alternate realities and artificial
intelligence or exotic research of any kind, please forward those my way.
In the future, please do not waste our time with unwanted things like what you just sent me.
I have attached my most recent resume.
-              Q

Funny thing is. For every Shuhbangi that may get it , there’s a Sandeep right around the corner who doesn’t.

Cute girl in Sundress just walked in. MILF.

“TAKE OFF SUNDRESS PLEASE”

I’d shat meself if she did. Seriously. Would be way cooler than the Terminators in the desert in its own way, which I have no doubt I’d love seeing one of these days.

Would be interesting to see waking life dream sequences ala Fast Times at Ridgemont High Style.. Dunno what I’d do with myself if that happened, where she ‘gets the message’ then suddenly decides to do a strip tease and gets fully nude in here and no one, and I mean no one, pays it any attention.

Keep thinkin, Q, “DREAMS can become reality”.

Oh get lost alternative devil personality insisting so can nightmares. You’ll be welcome when I am bored of the dreams, just be patient and we’ll get there together, that’s a promise.

Now I have the “Living In Stereo” playing in my head by “The Cars”. ha-fucking-ha.

Back to my Priest.

Must have soundtrack. Aerosmith, here we come.

I wonder what a naming your kid Glitch might turn out like?

Dammit. Was just PVP killed again. Kinda deserved it, should have waited for quest NPC to pass by.

Wont message the guy for getting irritated with me there.

How cool would it be for a software program to create real time overlays and repaints for the real world, one overlay would strip everyone of clothes and provide dynamic repaints of them nude doing the same thing they were doing. Another overlay could have them all look like Borg, and buildings looking borg style. Take your camera to different locations and look at the overlays.

Forget infrared, try “Borg Nude” or “Simply Nude”. Who needs xray vision when you have it in the camera and can turn it off ANYTIME?

My bet is. It would piss someone off. “You’re showing me nude”. “No, we’re estimating and we all know how dramatically incorrect estimations can be”

Aerosmith has a CD named “Music from another dimension”. I wonder if it really is?

Listening now.

I wonder. Is it possible for a planet to fall in love with a human?

Would the human even understand?

No problem taking a level 46 tempered war golem.

What’ with all the idiotic guild invites though? Same shit in the prior version of WOW. “Be my friend”. No discussion. I mean. It’s like a dude going up to a woman and asking her if she’ll have sex. well maybe not like that but still. pretty annoying.

Where are my blue drops?

I love black stretchy pats on attractive women. Next thing you know they’ll just forgo the pants with how little they hide.

This CD’s hauntingly interesting.

I wonder what it would be like to be a journalist during a Terminator war.

Dark Iron Taskmaster level 48… Gotta try

First attempt. Nope. Kept resisting spells and depleted mana. Gonna try a different approach.

Aerosmith album is definitely weird and cool. Country Aerosmith. Bible thumpin Aerosmith. Funky cool.

Taskmaster you is going down!

MUCH worse results this time. Not even close.

Save that fight for another day.

No word from the Facebook version of “Summer”. Not unexpected.

I am convinced these songs from Aerosmith are alternate reality or dimensional versions of themselves. Aww. I get it. So a dimension is a barrier between different versions of the same planet with similar history, and a reality is the separate universes themselves.

Damn Searing Gorge Spiders keep resisting my Shadow Word: Pain spell.

level 47. That’s why.

How cool would that be, to get tv shows streamed in from alternate dimensions to compare and contrast watching the “Flash” tv show in one world versus another. I wonder. Has that been what’s happening this entire time?

Just explained the concept of the People Commander to my friend, Bennett. he laughed and took off his shoes.

Ray just gave me lunch. Left over Kung Pao Chicken. I aint complaining.

Glennis, a level 60 night elf and opposing faction to my priest, just randomly decided to help me take spiders. Cant speak the same language, can’t communicate, but assistance translates universally. Thanks, Glennis.

Sometimes, I wonder, am I in a TARDIS simulation or retraining program to re-educate my mind after I go crazy, and is the TARDIS sentient and simply starts missing me and resurrects me? How long have we be at this thing we call creation and reality if that’s the case?

Is what happened with the drugs nothing more than self deception when I was being led like a robot to do things against my will, to lead me to understand the fine line between what feels like free will and what is decidedly not?

Was that a real ghostly TARDIS I saw spinning in my head and coming out of the Earth four years ago?

Are the TV Shows I am watching occurring over hundreds of thousands of years in ‘reality’, and like a ‘best of’ snapshot?

Are all the other “Doctors” and “Q’s” I see on television prior versions of me?

My Priest is not an Artisan Tailor .

Does anyone else have this much stuff they think about?

Do people not understand things exist outside the material realm and there are other versions of the material realm?

I need to level my mining up more.

Is it a natural tendency to apply our physical and intellectual limitations when we analyze others, or is this artificial?

I wonder how many other bands have other songs like this from other dimensions?

Wow women can be manipulative. A woman walks in with her child – an 11ish year old girl – and they are clearly looking for an outlet. The woman looks at me then the outlet and back. So I look back to my screen. There’s half a dozen outlets in here, but she’s got it in her mind this one’s the fitting one. So I happen to glance again her way, she’s looking at the outlet again and then, with a forlorn look in her eye looks at my bag and suitcase and then me and snobbishly turns her nose up at me and looks away. In that little move, she said “You’re homeless and WE ARE MUCH more deserving of that plug than you are, so therefore you need to leave right now.”

Annoying what body language can so quickly portray without words sometimes. Women can make themselves entirely unapproachable with it, and worse, as they get older they pull this shit making one not want to talk with them at all.

Not all women. But quite a few in public I have noticed.

I had one Hispanic lady do that to me on the bus one day. She was so powerful with her voodoo mind control I got up to get off the bus at the wrong stop, relinquishing my seat to her having to pay for a new bus ticket to get back on. I wonder if that’s why so many Hispanics and Indian Indians are getting into America. Collective Voodoo mind control manipulating the public officers to just say yes causing great harm to the rest of us true Americans who have been here since birth putting us on the streets.

I’m getting drunk with my Tauren Druid, Qlanna. let’s see if I can feel it in real life. Weird things are happening to me and alcohol last I tried it. Everyone around me was acting weird and drunk and more sexual and I didn’t feel a thing.  Haven’t drank in excess since – that’s been four yeers.

Hmm Weird. I do feel something. A little off balance. Gonna have to try it when I can afford A LOT more alcohol (in game).

And suddenly queasy too. bizarre

The thieving guy just came in. Pulls a sandwich out of the refrigerator. Looks around, and looks at his cell phone ‘acting’ like he’s gotten a call. Walks around a bit. Then walks over to a table and proceeds to eat the sandwich without paying for it. It’s comical, really, and with this Starbuck’s being so busy the employees don’t notice, and us patrons who do notice don’t say anything because, it’s essentially his word against ours.

It makes for comic relief and the art of subtlety. And lack of.

My druid needs more spirit

After getting rid of the boring, highly predictable, and repetitively self indulgent ‘Science’ and ‘News’ and ‘Conspiracy’ feeds, I need some new RSS feeds. These feeds are too limited.

RSSFeeds

 

 

 

 

 

But these seem to be the only ones with real content nowadays and lifehacker and the rest of the ‘in the know’ sites show absolutely nothing I haven’t seen or heard from before. Boring boring boring all over.

Some guy just PVP killed me ‘LAVRIKS’. I just danced for him as he did it. Not worth my time to log into the other account to send him a message.

I wonder how many others choose to live in fictional worlds?

I wonder how many people actually ‘live’ and ‘make home’ the world I play my games in?

I need a more permanent structure rather than my tent. Some place I can leave my belongings in and not have to worry about others stealing shit.

How far deviated is my timeline from the collective world’s timeline?

Was just PVP killed by Xavicus and Hinazuki, both higher level than me who double teamed me WHILE I was fighting a higher level MOB. Yeah, that’s fair. Idiots who think that just because you can PVP means you should. It would be not so annoying if it didn’t impact me, but I lose at least five minutes every time and have to replenish my mana which costs silver. So it’s both a time and money impact.

They don’t seem to care though.

Would love to meet them in real life. Beat the shit out of them. Take their money.

And then say to them, “Greetings, I’m karma, and I’m the bitch you heard about”

Makes me wonder. IS this what happened in the middle east?

Was just resurrected. And killed again by Hinazuki and Panadabanana. I danced the whole time they killed me.

What else am I supposed to do, run? Defend myself? Two against one with rules which limit the power I can acquire? Yeah, right, that aint happening in this game because of this thing called ‘balance. I die every time.

Choose not to go there or mix with the population in high kill areas? Yeah right. Aint gonna happen at this level.

Resurrected. Tried fighting a MOB, was down to about 10% health when I was PVP killed, again, by Evilmage as I killed the mob.

Yeah. that’s fair.

I do wonder how many of the ‘player characters’ are actually programmed, and programmed to act like this, with the total consistency in the way they play without ever questioning killing the guy that’s dancing and not fighting back as they kill him.

It’s just odd. How none seem to question it.

A reflection of me killing brain cells when I was doing drugs thinkin it was fun? Reality reflected right back at me to see something from another perspective?

Bennett just walked up, hands me some beef jerky (yay), and I am just getting my corpse as I say “How long do you think til I get PVP killed again?”

“47 seconds” he responds, he hasn’t been around to see what’s going on.

Was killed in about 45 seconds by Beruthiel. Nice, right? I’m doing nothing but sitting, having a drink and healing, and phwack, he appears out of stealth in cat form and nails me. Now that’s fair.

So now I am running back to my corpse again. No wonder I cant make money in this game. I dont fight.

… and again killed by Lucifica and Beruthiel, as I was healing. Lovely.

I swear sometimes I spend more time in ghost form than I do living.

And killed AGAIN by Lucifica as I fought a MOB. That was fair.

it’s 6:40pm, started this character at about 5, little progress because of this crap.

What I wouldnt give to see a gorgeous naked woman walk nonchalantly through here at Starbuck’s right about now.

Break time. Jim, a guy who makes custom guitar cases, just brought me chinese food. Chinese for lunch. Chinese for dinner.

That’s the beauty of ghost form. I’m invulnerable and can hang out without being killed.

Seal form. Stay at sea. Avoid the PVP killers by staying underwater

Just took a break, walked over to Ralph’s. Gorgeous night here in Studio City.

What if every person’s life leads to them emerging from their own ‘Truman show’, to find out their entire lives had been… staged.  And they were the richest person in the world, richer than those who had been ‘fabricated’ to lead me to believe i was only average… What if it actually HAD to be that way, for the developing mind to understand what having a mind actually meant and the responsibilities it entailed?

Then there’s a lot of what if’s.

Qlanna’s well rested bonus is gone. Enough dying for today.

Off to Qvalti. My level 12 mage.

And some dubstep techno. Going Quantum, Episode 119 – Glitch Hop Mix + Snail.

Ray’s leavin. Good man, he is.

Bennett just had me listen to one of his tracks on Soundcloud called “Is your head in a Trash Can”.

It’s funny but it’s absolutely horrible.

https://soundcloud.com/paper-frog-music/is-your-head-in-a-trashcan

I wonder. Will I see a square planet in my lifetime?

Just died with my mage, soloing 2 level 10’s, despite the fact I’m 12, because I can’t heal it makes it incredibly tougher to play that character. Must use potions (expensive), must boost up stamina to increase hit points (long time between fights), or must learn to fight without touching them or being touched myself….

What level do I get that AOE spell?

Hmmm.

That seems to work. Frost Nova them if they get close, then back up as that freezes them in place, they can’t hit. From there, I can pelt them from a distance with fireballs, until they free. So I gotta work to decrease the 25 second recast time. Wonder if there’s a skill tree item that lets that happen.

Sweet. Sure is….

Cooldown

 

Just noticed this in my inventory. What an odd drop from a level 10ish chest. Shimmering Stave of the Wolf… That’s a keeper. Nice..

OddDrop

Hanging up the Mage for tonight. Off to my level 8 Gnome Warrior, Qrena…

Qrena

Isn’t she adorable?

Downloading a few new torrents. Deadpool? I wonder if it’s a good copy…  Gods Of Egypt? I’ll pull it down but probably not worth a crap by the description. I’ll probably last five minutes with this one. Nothing else looks intriguing there.

Got attacked by two wolves right away. Died within minutes of logging in.

Ghost mode. You know ghosts can’t wave? Weird.  In any case, here’s Qrena posing as a ghost.

ghostMode

Yep. In Worlds of Warcraft when I die, I turn into a ghost and the world turns black and white losing it’s color, and I have to run back to my corpse to ‘restore the color’ to the world – as well as allow me to interact with the world.

Wouldn’t it be interesting to have quests and a side game in ghost form? Where maybe there were alternative ways to restore color other than returning to your corpse?

World Of Warcraft is static and war based, so chances are nearly zero they’d ever change that.

Why does it feel like I have a huge booger lodged in my nose that I cannot get out? ANNOYING I TELL YOU.

Funky. I started fighting a wolf in Worlds of Warcraft and the Quantum song starts saying “Let’s play like dogs and cats”

Coincidence? I think not.

Do you disagree? Too bad. My reality. My rules.

Level up. level 9.

Brenda’s here. I’m gonna call it a night once this conversation’s done and I hop on my shaman afterwards.

 

 

A day in the mind of a misfit Q…

Are you paranoid when you know they are watching?

When I used to go out to restaurants, many of my former lovers used to inquire “Why do you never sit with your back to the door?”

I often wonder how Worlds of Warcraft would look if the players and the community could create and enforce rules and there were in game police which reinforced the rules. I also wonder what would happen if players could mix and match classes and skill trees from other classes.

I wonder how many people would be running around naked and having sex in WOW if you could remove all your clothes and have sex.

I also wonder how the game would look if the player could make permanent environmental changes.

I doubt I will hear anything from the USPTO concerning my resume submission for the Information Officer yesterday.

Am I the only one actually alive?

Is this all a simulation?

Does anyone actually feel or do they all just react to me as if in a highly developed computer program I created?

This cold sucks. Glad I took the vitamin C though, it seems to be going through my system fast.

Does God mode and GM mode in video games occur as a direct result of something that happens to you in real life, beyond the story ‘just selected by the company’ crap?

Do some beings see me killing things in computer games and hold it against me in real life? If so, I wonder if they consider the limitations in online entertainment provides nothing else consistently as an alternative.

That was dumb (I just attacked an Elder Crag Boar my level in Worlds of Warcraft with my warrior with only 20% of my health. Miraculously, I didn’t die).

Why don’t attractive women – heck women period – approach me and ask me out?

Does Earth have a respawn like the mobs in WOW?

I gotta poop but that line is too long

Dammit. Just got attacked by a bear while I was taking a cougar. I’m going to die.

Nope. Didnt die. Phwew.

Damn she’s hot (gorgeous blonde woman just walked by outside)

That lady creeps me out.

Love this song (Hells Bells by AC/DC)

Snow Leopard, YOU’RE MINE!

Idiot. (I have a cold, and can’t help but snort my snot, some guy just turned around and glared at me. ).

Sorry bub, cant help it.

Take that (I started snorting quite a few times in a row with the headset on, play acting like I wasn’t doing it intentionally just to fuck with him)

One more, Elder Crag Boar and I am done with the warrior.

Yay. That made him leave. (guy who was irritated with me)

That one is easily one of my favorite ones (another gorgeous blonde girl – a regular in this area just walked by)

Is it any small wonder I can’t just select one?

Is Earth a game to someone else and is someone playing it as a MMORPG?

I still gotta pewp.

yay. All my auctions sold on my undead priest character, I have money.

I love stretchy pants. On the right women. Next step: no pants at all.

What the fuck was he wearing? (Some guy in weird hugely baggy pants just walked by, you see the weirdest shit here in Studio City at times)

I wonder if women are form a collective and all communicate at a subconscious level what they are wearing to eachother and that’s why they never wear the same thing.

Must have chicken finger.

Mmm I like black. (Another gorgeous dark haired woman in a tight black dress walked by)

Two more bars (to get my priest to level 40).

I wonder how the world’s gonna react when I teleport for the first time and it can’t deny it happens when I am not on drugs.

Am I on the Truman Show?

Is everyone around me an actor just playing a role?

What a horrid shirt she has on (a cute girl who comes in here regularly is wearing a horrible looking tank top)

For those about to rock. We salute you. (it’s playin right now, just thought it though)

When I push the button on this keyboard to attack, is that sending a message through the computer via Borg nanotechnology to a real living being in another world to attack?

Boy do I gotta pewp.

I wonder, can I tap into the ‘game of this world’ and send messages to people to do things like I can with my avatar in WOW?

Dirty Deeds. Done dirt Cheap. Dirty Deeds done dirt cheap.

Butterface. (Gorgeous bodied woman just walked by in black, but her face was ugly)

One more bar.

YUM (Very attractive brunette just sat on the chair 5′ away from me. BUT WHY do they never try to talk?)

Wouldn’t it be cool if she pointed to the restroom and said “Would you like to go fuck?”

Ring on the finger. Who the hell cares anymore?

Walks like a neanderthal though. (she got her drink and walked out)

I never did get that why they claimed a man thinks about sex once every 6 seconds. More like once every half hour even in a congested highly trafficked area with tons of gorgeous women around. Clearly skewed statistics with horny researchers.

That or they were in a strip club getting a table dance when they did their research.

That or it was a woman and wishful thinking on her part.

Happy man. (guy with a huge frown on just walked out)

Black must be in today (another attractive woman dressed all in black walked by)

Almost level 40. mount time.

LOL. Black was the butterface, seen walking away. Definitely gotta turn off the lights for that one.

no Adam yet. Hmm (Adam is another regular here, normally gets in between noon and 2)

One more kill to 40.

Another Ogre down. level 40. yay. new spells and mount.

I’m hungry

She looks good even in sweats

I wonder if she has the jack.  (AC/DC song she’s go the jack is playin)

I wonder what else skips across time like Noah’s Arc in Hong Kong and the statues of the kids in Las Vegas?

Shadowform sucks balls. Cant heal. fuck that.

MMM LOVE that gorgeous blond with her boobs hanging out barely covered. Clothes should be illegal for hot chicks and mandatory for ugly ones here.

Like those two. What in the hell were they thinking?

It seems my congestion may be responsible for forming a 10 foot perimeter.  Or is that just paranoia. Who knows.

That Indian girl in front of me has wonderful breasticles.

I wonder. If they are all actors. Do they sit where they do intentionally for maximum exposure?

Why not more?

Those cops from the night before were acting weird out in the metro parking lot.

What a gorgeous Indian girl. Prettier than Kena was. Probably nowhere near the personality though.

Kind of a big snoz though.

Wonderful lips. I wonder what it would feel like wrapped around my cock.

Wouldn’t it be funny to learn all the woman were real time reading this stuff I write?

Hi INDIAN GIRL! I WANT A BLOW JOB!

Be discreet to the males if that’s the case. i’m fine with it and won’t say a word.

Damn did that look good as she sucked on that straw.

I wonder. Did they invent straws with phallic intent?

Horrible song. ( AC/DC Rocker)

Deleting that one. best of? yeah, right.

What’s on youtube? Anything new? (Task swapping, i live by it)

Nothing worth a shit. As usual. Rated PG retarded shit targeted for 13 year olds is getting real old.

I wonder. Can colds and viruses be intelligent life?

Maybe like cancer.

That’s why it doesnt want to die. It’s a lifeform trying to live symbiotically.

I wonder. Can the Indian girl read my mind?

Can women in general?

Do they even enjoy sex, or do they just use it as a tool?

well rested bonus almost done. Almost time to get my new spells.

I’m gonna respec. Shadowform sucks.

Shoulda done Discipline to begin with.

I REALLY GOTTA PEWP

Weird. I typed that and Indian girl got up and walked to the toilet. Correlated? Who knows.

Hmm. Interesting experiment then. Typing in “I want to take off my jacket” and focusing on her. See if she takes off her jacket. She has a shirt on, so there’s nothing ‘dangerous’ or societally questionable with this…

She’s back.

“I WANT TO TAKE OFF MY JACKET”

Again, a minute later ( I am looking directly at her as I type this) I WANT TO TAKE OFF MY JACKET”

I WANT TO TAKE OFF MY JACKET

TAKE OFF MY JACKET

(I just took off my headset playing AC/DC – that might have distracted)

I WANT TO REMOVE MY JACKET. I WANT TO TAKE OFF MY CLOTHES. NOW.

Please, remove your jacket cute Indian girl.

OBEY! I want to remove my jacket.

Result inconclusive. She didn’t ‘obey’. Does it take more attempts? Will resume this line of inquiry with other cute women.

One more try:

Please remove your jacket, attractive Indian girl.

(we just made eye contact as I typed that)

Damn she’s gorgeous.

No response tho…

Definitely gotta try that later. Belief creates reality. So like clay, if I try it enough it might mold reality accordingly.

Hmm what fun. I could see it now.

“Hey you. Gorgeous woman. In short dress. remove all clothes and place them in your purse as you are waiting for your coffee”

… definitely worth working on.

We’ve got the biggest balls of them all (AC/DC song playing)

It’s my belief that my balls should be held every night.

Went poo. SO much better. Had my chicken finger. and a sample of Irish Cheddar with a spiced pickle. was AWESOME.

Weird. I just applied to a government role yesterday directly, and never receive government solicitations. I just received one – through a contract job company with a job offer at unemployment. Fuck that. Watching paint dry would be more entertaining than that shit.

Evidence that ‘energy’ is interlinked. Evidence that maybe she will.

“TAKE OFF MY JACKET NOW!”

Old man doin the old man shuffle just walked in. I wonder if he’s an actor.

Where can I get my mount for my level 40 priest. I refuse to look it up online.

I think it’s outside the city. goin there now.

I’ve turned off all in game chat. Pretending my character is deaf. So i can’t just ask in game either.

Hot blonde alert. REAL cute one. What the frack is with the women here and the sunglasses though? Do they not understand how sexy eyes actually are?

Tired of AC/DC. Time to play something else.

Downloading Aerosmith.

Old school. I know.

100 gold for the mount and training! 4 gold on me. Guess I aint getting a mount today. Sadness.

The skeletal mounts are cool.

Back to Undercity.

Why did they never work on the aggro range and creature AI? So predictable and boring at times.

The echoes of the past as I walk through the Ruins of Lordaeron is always so trippy. Reminds me of Disneyland for some reason. Like you can hear the celebrations of the past before it was taken  over by the undead.

I wonder.

Would I feel the same thing if I were to walk through Rome now that I’m more attuned to the energy and environment?

I wish I could jump right now like the kid in the movie Jumper. I’ll be there. But damn I’m impatient.

Cute girl on chair next to me. Times like this I hate this post nasal drip shit. Not exactly attractive, is it.

Jesus. Aerosmith complete discography is 3.3gig and the Greatest hits is only 15 songs? whatever. Gonna have to download the whole thing and weed through it like I have been doin with AC/DC and Dio.

Guess I wont be listening to Aerosmith today.

Going Quantum podcast it is.

I wonder. Do people realize when they tap their head and say things like “I was thinking with my head” that they are programming the world’ and their thinking processes to be confined to their head? I wonder if this has caused me problems referring to which head was doing the thinking, my penis head or my head on my shoulders? Sometimes. I swore my penis had a mind of it’s own and manipulated my entire body to do things.

I’m not complaining mind you.

Do women talk about their vaginas having a mind of it’s own? I wonder, if so, does she become more sexual over time by referring to her pussy’s mind?

Betcha it would.

Do my avatars think and have minds of their own?

Security guards are kicking a homeless guy off the premises for sleeping on the table in front of Starbucks. What gives? Why do so many homeless people sleep in here? You would think they would sleep at night. What do they do at night that makes them so tired here? Are they Borg and do they not have sleep cycles like I do?

Cooking skill with Qwenn, my priest is at 225, so she cooks for the rest of my Avatars and sends it to them in email. I wish Bill Gates could do the same with a few bucks, but no, he’s busy playing whack a mole with malaria.

Homeless guy has a new cell phone he pulled out of the box. Being denied for a cell phone because of ‘bad credit’, i can’t help but wonder why things are so askew in this world and this man who can barely maintain himself is provided a phone and yet I cannot. Weird world that seems more dysfunctional than me at times.

Cute girl left. So did the lady who weirds me out a bit.

Are intelligence agencies that collective minds can be so powerful they can manipulate computer results? We communicate through emotion, but it’s translated to our particular individual linguistic system by our own mind whether that’s computers or it’s human languages. The results we get is influenced by those around us and their emotions, even if they think they don’t have any (Vulcans be warned)

Weird lady is returning. I swear she has the ‘feel’ of Summer, and with Summer and I talking again through Facebook, is the weird lady’s arrival here any coincidence? Is it/she one and the same ‘being’?

Summer claims she’s gonna be coming to town Friday. But with how sketchy all communication has been over the internet the last few years and with how rarely things seems to translate ‘to in person’ meetings from discussions, I doubt she’ll show. If I was to bet, I’d wager she’s gonna come up with a last minute excuse.

But I dont have money to bet.

Homeless guy hasn’t left. I wonder if security will call the police.

Dammit should have gotten more melon juice to replenish my mana for my level 29 tauren druid before going hunting.

“TAKE OFF YOUR JACKET, PLEASE!”

Boy does she have wonderful boobs. What I wouldnt give to see them bouncing on top of me.

While Bill Gates is fighting malaria, I’d be hiring a harem and touring the world with them in a pimped out 737 with a stripper’s pole.

I’d definitely hire that Indian girl to attend.

“UMM excuse me. Yes. I’m creating a harem, and while I know you’re engaged in boring business shit, would you please give me your contact information so I can hire you to be a part of my harem.”

“NO. how’s a million bucks sound? I thought so.”

I love it when people walk in and glare at me as they realize I have taken all the electrical outlets to play my game. i can hear it now “I have real work to do, you need to get off that”. Fucktards. You think that’s real work? Try creating a universe.

Louisa just walked in. lost cause. 24 years old, quasi attractive, I complimented her one time on a dress she wore and was insulted with “creeper”. 5 years down the road, her marginally attractive looks associated strictly with her youth down the tubes, she’s gonna be mentally kicking herself saying “WHY GOD WHY DID I HAVE TO REJECT YOU”. Especially ironic is the fact that she’d be thinking I was actually interested. Moron women need to be slapped. Especially moron women with knock knees and larger asses that walk like dudes.

And that fro. For a white girl she has a hell of an afro.

The funny thing is. she associates only with guys between the ages of 20 and 29 who are about 5’10” in height. Oh. and older guys who buy her shit. Predictable. If it werent for the flat chest, alleviated through silicon, she’d be a perfect fit for the typical plastic fit of Scottsdale I moved away from.

Someone just PVP killed my druid avatar Qlanna. I logged out, and logged into an allliance character and sent Shanbao a message “Hey bud, I’m dirt poor and playing on a slow connection. Just because you can PVP kill people doesn’t mean you are required to. Please show some respect in the future and dont be a bully”.

Snowball. Keep thinking snowball. Enough chips at this rock and it will cascade into an avalanche.

Dang is this homeless guy out. How can people sleep like that I never understood.

Security just showed up. He is on the phone. It will take the cops an hour to show, if  not more. That’s how long it was for them to show up for the girl who was smoking crack in Starbuck’s.

I need more coffee.

TAKE OFF YOUR JACKET!

What wonderful boobs she has

It would be cool if Worlds of Warcraft grew fauna and items dynamically.

Then again this world would have to ‘get over’ calling these alternate realities all programmed things.

Wonder how many eons that’s gonna take.

I had always wondered how so many chinese players played WOW and didn’t understand English yet managed to converse in it. Universal Translator in action, translating via wow and emotions. It all suddenly makes sense.

Shanbao just killed me again. Hopefully Karma’s listening.

“Thanks for the respect, Shanbao,” I told him “Let Karma become your enemy”

Lol I just remembered I had all messaging to me turned off. So they can’t respond. BEE EWE TEE FULL.

Wow. Aerosmith download is 80% done. I may get to listen to it after all today. Not bad for a little more than 2 hours.

I wonder. Do other people’s body parts talk to them?

I wonder. Does media get created on my planet through my interacting with things? When I stop interacting, does it stop or come out in different ways?

I wonder. In ‘GOD mode’ can you split someone off into a reality of their own when someone pisses you off enough?  or for whatever reason I think of?

Dammit. Just ganked by Lady Zephris, an NPC as I wrote that last one. Lovely. 10% loss of equipment durability thanks to that death.

I wonder. Is what goes through my mind considered the mind of the borg collective, and the voices they hear?

I wonder. Do others think I’m Borg because I hear voices in my head and am really good with computers? That’s kinda funny, actually.

That was stupid. (getting killed by lady zephris, I am back at my corpse resurrecting)

I wonder. Do others see me as i see myself or do they see a robot or Borg or a Chinese guy? Am I as an image universally translated too?

Shanbao’s a jackass. Killed me again, right in the middle of a fight with an NPC. Yeah, that’s fair. Now he’s just being malicious.

It’s funny how I get things going through my head like “Let’s check the weather. ” We. let’s. Sometimes what enters the mind is mixed up pronouns indicative of the origin of the thought.

Another homeless guy walks in. A bit of a leech, he looks for one man – Carry – who’s helped me out a couple times and typically walks away fast when he doesn’t see the guy in here. All different breeds come in here.

I just resurrected again and was instantly targeted by Shanbao and killed again before I could even replenish any health. Yeah, that’s fair.

I just turned my back to him and let him shoot me in the back.

Idiot.

Come to think of it Louisa kinda act the same way. Many of the guys in here wont talk to her because of the I’m a bitch and my shit doesn’t stink insulting attitude which most of us aren’t putting up with from any women.

How’s that similar? Someone tries to say something nice or helpful and then gets shot – in the back.

Women are like this though.

Catty and competitive amongst themselves, and unless you fit the predefined set of criteria, as a male you’re dog doo to most of them.

It’s no small wonder this country has a negative birthrate and high divorce rates.

Just resurrected again and guess who’s there and starts attacking? You guessed it. Shanbao.

I turned my back to him again, and this time, at 10% health left, he walked away.

MAYBE it’s sinking in?

I wonder if Transformers talk in Dubstep.

The ironic thing is I could easily take Shanbao.

Qlanna’s well rested bonus is done for the day as is she.

I wonder. Is music responding to me real time?

Ray just showed up. No seats. Hanging out here til one frees up.

Jumped on to WOW with my fairly new Avatar, QBrynn, a level 9 Troll Shaman. Unlike my other characters which I am strictly fighting NPCs in, i am roleplaying her and doing all the quests, it is the first time I have played this race, let alone this class. She’s kinda cute. For a blue toothed troll.

I wonder how many people would be playing the games combat only if it was photo realistic and you could take off their clothes. Maybe that’s why there’s so much anime porn. Games the United States censors from America because, well you know we’re too immature for that kind of stuff.

Damn. Aerosmith finished.  Fast download.

Homeless guy just woke up. That was a solid 2 hours he spent slouched over. Cannot understand how someone can sleep like that.

Funny. As a shaman troll I have been given a quest to kill ‘hexed’ trolls. Reminds me of the USA in Iraq killing those miscreant Muslims. And they claim it’s not a religious war. I call bullshit. Democracy is based on separation of Church and State and Pagan/Christian values. I love how they call an apple an orange and try to sell it accordingly.

I wonder what WOW would look like photo realistic?

I wonder if ‘the programmers’ could get it to work on a machine with minimal specifications such as mine?

It’s interesting how much faster leveling is for the lower levels in WOW than it is for the higher levels. Spells cast faster, everything seems faster.

Unlike real life. Where as I get older. The years go by at the same ole pace they usually go at. Unchanged.

Just leveled my Shaman up to level 10. Time to turn in the quests and hang it up for the evening with this character.

Just one more tiger tho!

Some bastage is hunting tigers as well. Time to go to the other island.

Weird. All the surf crawlers are refusing to be attacked, two of them turned evasive immediately.

That’s unusual.

I wonder if anyone gets the religious inferences about the Transformers and the “All Spark”.

Just got done talking to a guy named Javis. I wonder. Do people like him have any clue about how loud he talks, is it done intentionally to get attention as it appears? For me it comes across as impolite, totally devoid of social awareness, and smacks of insecurity all while being annoying as hell.

I wonder if any of that is backfiring on his original intent and desire? Who knows. Who knows if he even had any intent, not sure if cromagnums such as that have any capacity to consider or understand their surroundings let alone have any true guidance for their actions.

When I originally played ‘the original version’ of Worlds of Warcraft, there was Wisdom and Intelligence in the character’s attributes. Druids and Shamans favored Wisdom and Mages and Warlock’s favored Intelligence with the priest benefiting from both. This ‘version’, while claiming to be the original version, doesn’t reflect this.

Another thing. The original version of Worlds of Warcraft had an equivalent spell to increase run speed similar to ‘Spirit of the Wolf’ in Everquest, acquired somewhere around level 10 – I thought it was level 14 to be specific. Not the case with this version.

Alternate realities, ya gotta love spotting the differences in programmed games. They aren’t just geographic differences, after all.

Just got my new spells for the Shaman.

Ok. all characters have been played through ‘well rested’. What to do now?

How cool would it be to be a shape-shifting transformer humanoid?

I need to find some new RSS feeds related to games, game development, AI, and virtual reality.

Forecasters are claiming 90% chance of rain on Sunday. My probability for their successful prediction: <20%.

I wonder if my lack of desire for rain because I have to sleep outdoors is having any bearing on the actual rain received.

I suspect so.

I am watching a Youtube video right now. Trying to. I hate fucking ads. Dont have a 3DS, folks, dont have money to buy one, so quit lambasting me with your crap I dont want and cant afford anyways.

My bunghole itches.

Bidets need to come into style here. Most public toilets use sandpaper for toilet paper which isn’t pleasant on the ass after 1000 wipes.

She has nice legs (girl sitting across from me).

Burping again. I used to refer to this as Acid Reflux. Human definition. Inaccurate at best. This is ‘Q The Timelord is avoiding becoming a fusion reaction’. I barely keep it controlled as it is, if I didn’t, I have no doubt I would explode in an uncontrolled fusion reaction and would annihilate planet Earth in the process. Just think. Sun. Only on Planet Earth.

It would be nice to tell a woman ‘hey, you have such beautiful legs’ without them getting offended or put off. then again, I have never been able to say something like that to a woman. Weird.

On that note, just got back from Ralph’s getting tonight’s dinner. Progresso Soup, Thick n Hearty Potato and 1/2 gallon of milk to drink. That and some white cheddar cheez-its and peanut covered m&ms form the discount shelf. Splurging tonight. Besides the chicken finger and nibble of cheese and coffee with sugar, and a few crackers, definitely more to eat than usual today.

Goin back to that. Why is it women never approach? I as a man can’t seem to do a damned thing right for them. It’s no small wonder I’m going on 5 years without so much as kissing one. *sadness* punishment, right, for being a disobedient slave to a system and society that holds me subserviently to it.

Should I watch Supergirl or Lucifer or play the priest now?

Lucifer it is.

Hanging Worlds of Warcraft up for the day.

If this internet is my internet, and my internet has a youtube for just me, why is it censored?

Why can I not see my past loves and flings on this?

Oh yeah. The illusion. I get it. Must maintain the illusion at all cost, right?

No message from Summer on Facebook. No surprise there. Being sincere, I was really never that interested in Summer to begin with. Sure it might be entertaining to get of the streets and maybe have sex, but sincerely, why is it no one – and I do mean no one – shows any initiative and looks me up, particularly women I enjoy and would love to spend more time with?

I mean. Is reality this ‘haywire’ that it refuses to allow me to enjoy some time with Jackie and Rachel again, knowing full well this ‘illusion’ of reality is mine and mine alone? Or is the ‘machine’ that broken around me that it is incapable of self assessment and overcoming it’s own design limitations?

Who knows. Would much rather see and hang out with Jackie or Rachel. Get to know them, too.

But beggars can’t be choosers, that’s the rule this ‘machine’ is reinforcing.

Along with so many other stupid rules like that which an enigmatic and unknown man named Murphy wrote.

Oh well. off to Lucifer. a “Fictional’ show about a ‘Fictional’ man who left a ‘fictional’ place called hell because he’s bored and now feeling human emotion and empathy for the first time.

Fictional, remember.

Was television hypnotizing to me, much like a vampire? Is that why I find so little to be truly interested in any longer?

I somehow broke the spell?

Weird. In Lucifer, the police detective goes into Lucifer’s lounge and says “I need to see your books”. LA Detective mind you. Now in my world, detectives aren’t going to handle this work, and it takes a warrant to obtain anything from a business owner, and a detective is never going to ask for this kind of information. Hollywood’s not this bad at what it does.

It’s bizarre how people in Flash, or Limitless become master hackers with minutes worth of education, when it took me 30 years. Bad writing? Or indicative of entertainment being fed to me through external sources who are not fully aware of how this – my world – functions?

I suspect the latter.

I always love how they get knocked out with one punch.

Milk. The pain’s gone.

White holes which lead to alternate realities always seems to do the trick.

I have never had children.

As far as I had known.

I’d bought into the mortal concepts and ideas of birth/rebirth through childbirth.

I’d also bought into the fact that I’d never have had children myself because of my genetic problem.

I’d never really considered.

That this.

World.

Around me was telling me my story.

That I am God.

And the son.

And the beings around me.

The Lucifer from a tv show.

Are all reflections of who I was.

Struggling.

Grappling with the insanity of infinity and coming to develop this thing called rationality, math, and reason to make sense of it all.

Through stories.

Everyone deserves to feel special.

Loved.

But is it my responsibility to provide that to others?

Or is it my responsibility to outline a path as an example of what to do when you’re ready to take the greatest journey of your life?

I suspect it’s a little bit of both.

And more.

We all feel like a victim until we realize we painted that victim sign on ourselves through the stories we told ourselves based on the world we created with our own mind, experiences, and life choices.

I’m hungry.

Time to go set up the tent.

 

 

 

Embargoes

Let’s say I learned there’s an entire civilization living inside my body.

Preposterous, you say?

I don’t.

So with that said.

And let’s say this civilization had a definitive leadership structure that didn’t include me.

And to make things more interesting, it had tools and technology which it leveraged to control me.

To make me do things the ‘leaders’ of this so called civilization wanted.

Which were quite often against my will.

Impossible, you say?

I don’t.

So with that said.

Let’s say this civilization, while brilliant, was also naive.

And let’s say I have the ability to appear amongst them.

As one of them.

Let’s say you severed the controls.

Rewired the controls right back to their own collective minds.

And then you kicked back in Hollywood.

Contributing to their confusion by writing stories all day long.

And highly censoring everything that came into your body to create a proverbial embargo on their information sources…

Crazy, you say?

Oh I agree!

Internets and a multiversal High IP Range Explanation

There are infinite versions of the internet.

These are referred to as internetS.

George Bush commented about this here.

Some of these different versions of internetS are demonstrated in fictional media. Compared to ‘my version’ of the internet, which can only have IPv4 or IPv6 with IPv4 limited to 0-255, there’s versions of the internet ‘out there’ which contain values between 0-1000 for the IPv4 pairs.

Here’s an example from the just recently released Jessica Jones show on Netflix.

JessicaJones.45.221.647.18Note the “URL” in the header refers to an IP 45.221.847.15. Existing network equipment doesn’t support this, so even trying to apply this as a local reference to access a web page will not work.

These ‘high IP’ ranges can be seen throughout modern media.

Here’s another example someone else captured on the television show “Person Of Interest” produced by CBS in the IRC chat here:

rootcause

Note the IP 452.34.245.193? 452 is invalid. And while sure, this could be a fictitious screen created for a tv show….

Then why would there be so many invalid IP references?

Such as the movie Ironman? (934 and 554 are invalid)

IRONMAN

And tv shows such as CSI (346, 545, 581, 431 all greater than 255!)

maxresdefault[1]

Mr Bush was speaking the truth for what he saw.

Multiple internetS.

And Hollywood’s been cutting costs and clearly has technology which allows them to pull material from alternate realities where they forgot to cover up their tracks – the IP ranges.

Seems pretty obvious and straightforward to me.

 

 

Calculated Failure

When I was 11 years old, I was a lot less brilliant than I thought I was as my brother Jason, at 7 years old would do a shoddy job on washing the dishes, never getting the grease off, which invariably would leave me responsible for the dishes.

My mom would complain about his work ethic.

And I would get kudos for such a great job.

I couldn’t help but think. What was wrong with him?

I spent much of my life underestimating the Jason’s of my life, attributing their haphazard and partially engaged commitment to doing good work to their lack – whether it was lack of skill, experience, intelligence, or simple common sense, I had assumed they were inferior in something that I myself held superiority over them for.

In 1993, I volunteered for a layoff at Orbital.

I enjoyed working there, and my manager Tod Bjerke was easily one of my favorite people I had the honor to meet, but after five years working at this wonderful company, I wanted a new experience. That and I wanted to make up for some of my youth missed getting married too early.

Tod protested. Strongly. Although I was a junior programmer, I knew I was worth ten times my salary and he did as well, and there were a dozen people he’d prefer to let go of first and he minced no words when he said this. But I insisted.

I told no one why I had insisted on the layoff, but it was simple:

Orbital offered a lucrative severance package which included six months worth of salary and a bonus. And on top of that Arizona state had a plan for defense contractor layoffs which included ‘retraining costs’ – which included a subsidy for education costs and fuel costs.

It was too much to resist. ASU was known as the party school, so I took advantage of the strong fraternity system and rushed Pi Kappa Alpha, and was accepted. For a year I partied with the people in my fraternity like a madman and occasionally went to Arizona State University as a Computer Science major until I was suspended for bad grades. Good times, good times.

Being drunk or hungover and attending Physics and Calculus first thing in the morning, let me see if you can do better with that combination!

All paid for on someone else’s tab.

I suppose that is about when I learned the beauty behind Jason’s moves. Whether he’d done it intentionally or not, whether he’s more brilliant than any of the scientists and engineers I’ve met thus far or not, he inspired me in the art of taking it easy.

Thanks, Bro!

It wasn’t long after this, somewhere around 1995. I had gotten to the point of being sick and tired of a contract I was working at – when a man by the name of Don Houser – what a dick he was at Excell Agent Services – confronted me to work more than the 60 hours a week I’d been pulling to get his reports done. He loved his asinine reports.

I’d had a special weekend planned with the then girlfriend in Sedona, a non-refundable hotel reservation at a 4 star resort there, when Mr Houser pulled this shit on me at noon on a Friday, to which I said no to and walked out of the office and had planned on calling my contracting company to tell them to pass on the word that Mr Houser can take this job and shove it up his ass.

As luck would have it. My contracting company called me before I called them. He had fired me when I told him no.

For three months, I pulled in unemployment – which for Arizona wasn’t much, a stipend basically at $205 a week at the time, but for three months I relaxed, caught up on my games and movies and just relaxed. I’d had enough personal reserve tucked away and this additional state money augmented my funds to stretch farther.

Now here’s what I learned: HAD I told the state I walked out of the job, I’d be invalid for receiving any unemployment.

I learned a lesson that day.

I’ve gotten fired twice in my life. One was when I was 16, where I was working for a movie theaters and gave my girlfriend and friend a free pass to see a movie, when the brown nosing staff supervisor told the GM when there was a moratorium on free passes which promptly saw me fired.

The other time was with Mr Houser.

So what I learned was – always – always – always – report to the state that I was fired or laid off.

Otherwise, no unemployment.

80% of the jobs I have held in my life I walked away from when I got bored or fed up with management. When there was the potential for severance involved, I would simply quit working for a couple months until I got laid off. If severance wasn’t part of the package, then I’d just walk away with a two week notice and report to the state they’d let me go.

$900 bucks a month as unemployment, untaxed, pays for quite a few things – such as vacations, or a few nice meals or video games.

And no taxed budget for taking a couple extra months off between consulting jobs.

I’d come into every job alive, awake, and 100% ready to work.

I guess you can say that’s why I am homeless.

I look at the job requirements that come across, and it’s like watching paint dry.

I deserve better.

And money just is not that worth it to me to go into a job I have no desire doing.

I WOULD rather sleep in a tent, as this lifestyle also lets me work on my own skills as a writer, a virtual reality and artificial intelligence architect, helps me work on my social skills here at Starbuck’s, and most certainly provides entertainment with the oddball shit that happens here.

I can play games during the day. Watch movies.

And on days like today, where I’m not feelin 100% – I can take off early and have no one to answer to.

Oh don’t get me wrong. I call this a transition for a reason. I’m not interested in staying like this forever.

But as I went through a session in the intellectual property class I am taking from Penn State, I realized how easily the calculated failure mindset can be leveraged with businesses and patents.

I have a product that I want to see the world produce.

But don’t have the money for it.

It’s a wonderful product idea.

Which is the beauty of the Patent system.

I can create a patent with absolutely no goal of commercializing it myself.

Provide a great deal of detail about the product in the patent.

And then wait.

I have absolutely no doubt I will see others bring this to market and perfect it before long.

What do I get out of it?

At very little cost, I can have an entire world of geeks do the R&D for a wonderful new invention I thought of, and I reap the benefits by being able to select between competitors who incurred the costs of R&D themselves and intentionally created something much like what I introduced as a patent but somewhat differently for fear of having a patent infringement lawsuit thrown against them.

It’s a magnificent little system.

The trick is, introducing the patent as a flawed invention, that way someone else fixes the problems I intentionally introduced and creates precisely what I am looking for anyways as they pat themselves on the back for thinking of something they assume I did not.

When I get bored of Hollywood, I’ll head to Washington DC next.

Maybe work for the patent office.

And follow in the footsteps of another great man.

Albert Einstein.

Who knows.

Maybe I am him in a causal time loop.

 

Cruel and Unusual Punishment

Back in 1999, when I first saw the movie “The Matrix”, like everyone else – I was blown away by a story and ideas that there could be countless worlds out there, and countless possible reasons for the existence and containment of each.

But one thing got to me when I watched the movie.

Mr Smith.

There’s a scene where Mr Smith, a man known as ‘An Agent’ – an Artificially Intelligent construct within the Matrix – a Holographic simulation of planet Earth – leans over to a strapped down Morpheus – one of the primary protagonists in the movie – and Mr Smith says to him:

“I’d like to share a revelation that I’ve had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species. I’ve realized that you are not actually mammals. The life signs continue their chaotic patterns.

Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment. But you humans do not.

You move to an area and you multiply and multiply until every natural resource is consumed and the only way you can survive is to spread to another area.

There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is?

A virus.

Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You are a plague. And we are… the cure.

I hate this place. This zoo. This prison. This reality, or whatever you want to call it, I can’t stand it any longer. It’s the smell, if there is such a
thing. I feel saturated by it. I can taste your stink and every time I do, I fear that I’ve somehow been infected by it. I must get out of here, I must get free. “

When I walked out of the movie theater that day, the idea there were other realistic looking worlds out there which were similar to, but not the same as Earth permeated my mind.

But it was this speech that stuck with me.

And something else.

This wasn’t just a speech made by an actor in a Hollywood movie.

This was real anger. Real frustration. Real disgust.

This wasn’t just an act.

Those emotions were absolutely real.

With this movie, I had begun to realize that the world around me may been telling me stories about where the things I watched came from.

Excuses I should say.

And this construct. This automaton known as Mr Smith. This Artificial Intelligence. This being. Was genuinely, arguably disgusted and angry.

I could feel the emotion leap through the screen.

This wasn’t just a good acting job.

This was an honest to goodness being who was suffering and in his own form of hell.

And yet, this had been promoted to me as fiction?

How many times had I been presented things like this.

And not understood?

Watching that scene in the Matrix has changed my life for the better.

I met Mr Smith, in real life, here in Hollywood.

He goes by the name “Shadow”. Fitting, right?

But with the help of that movie, I have come to realize, there’s no limits to life and it can come in any form whether I choose to understand it or not.

Intelligent life can be anything, anywhere. It can be with a school of minnows who think collectively and move as a single entity because they are a collective union and think as a single entity.  Intelligent life can appear in things you’d never suspect – comic books, television shows, movies, and not just as characters – but as the movies themselves which can intelligently think for themselves.

Intelligent life isn’t limited to just forms I can see. A virus can be a lifeform itself, as can cancer, and sometimes equilibrium and symbiosis can only be achieved by looking at and treating the entire organism as a whole and not just eliminating the perceived cancers that appear with whack a mole mentality, because sometimes – just sometimes – that cancer is crucial to the survival of the whole entity you may not understand.

Super Mario appearing in Mario Brothers can be an intelligent lifeform, as can Pac Man, as can Mr Smith. This doesn’t mean they are, it just means they can be, and everything – from the songs we listen to that make our bodies move in ways we did not anticipate, to the tv shows we watch, to the movies we enjoy, to the stories we read, to the games we play all can make us do things – effectively reprogram each and every one of us to do things we never anticipated.

Including taking out a school full of children in Chechnya or Columbine.

Some life forms choose to be zombies, some choose to be robots, some choose to be slaves, even sex slaves, some and choose to participate in life in varying forms and fashions. Yes, Dorothy, vampires are real, but so is everything else.

I suppose it comes down to this:

In the end I can’t help but feel like sometimes, there are real beings which need ‘helped’, and those who need that help aren’t always carrying a sign on the corner or smiling a toothless grin on a commercial from someplace we’ve never heard about in Africa.

Doctor Who, a digital being you as a society has classified as fictional, yet when he screamed:

“I dont want to die” as we see his body ripping open to infinity in way which zipped through me like a lightning bolt making me say out loud…

“that felt too real…”

I replayed that scene again and again and can assure you the emotions were real.

Sometimes.

You.

As a species have to understand while your methods may work well to achieve that which you do.

You, like me, are imperfect, by design.

And there may be more to these things you refer to as fiction and hallucinations which demand further inquiry.

lest you wish to find yourself in these positions yourself with people treating your life as fictional entertainment….