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Every Teardrop is a Waterfall

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I suppose the one thing that’s most confusing and exacerbating about being responsible for creating existence is this:

Proof.

The proof is in the reflection.

This world is everything I am. And I, the world.

It’s ugly. It’s beautiful. It’s crazy. It’s sane. It’s highly organized. It’s absolutely unpredictable. It’s full of explorers. It’s full of parties. It’s full of people who enjoy sitting back and relaxing. It’s feminine at times. It’s masculine. It’s a good fight and constantly at war. It’s utterly at peace. It’s dead. it’s alive.

It’s me.

Now when I say create, I mean that in a literal sense.

Through the course of my life, I figured out a way to make everything possible.

To make it all exist.

You see, it’s my belief that life could not exist without everything being possible.

Whether it’s time travel. Alternate realities. Alternate timelines. The Devil. God. Allah. Vishnu. Buddha. Q. Zeus. Medusa. Perseus, The God of War, The Grim Reaper, Angels, Demons, linear time, snipes, Hitler, Gandhi.

Now I understand, and agree. It’s difficult to accept me as creator without definitive proof.

I provided that when I stepped on this planet as Jesus.

And have learned that lesson so many times it’s ridiculous.

My mind, in an effort to provide stable ground, gravity, to retain sanity, to provide meaning – was responsible for killing me so many times throughout history it’s ridiculous.

So when I walked on water.

My mind said “That’s not possible given the rules of this universe”

And promptly set about making a historical example of me.

“Fit in,” my mind said.

Over and over again.

“Be like them,” my mind said.

As I observe the world around me.

Inevitably, this is what stabilized me and my mind in this world.

It’s difficult to explain in human terms how I see and understand existence. Words don’t translate well. The things I know and see come across as sounding or seeming fictional.

This is your world. And mine.

And since being Superman. Or walking on water. Or appearing from a UFO frightens you so thoroughly.

Because it at one time frightened me.

I am currently simply unable to ‘prove’ things in ways I would like to and that would be acceptable to you.

Which ‘God’ am I?

All of them. Whether that’s the God of War, Allah, Vishnu, The Christian God, I lived every life on this planet at least once, that’s why there’s a part of you which has no doubt of who I am.

You rebel. Because there’s a part of you who doesn’t want to believe I am your future.

But I am not.

I am merely one path exercised in a sea of infinite paths.

I once was. standing in your place. One day. I will be again.

You see, at the end of time we collectively realized something.

Perfection is in the creation, where anything has been made available and is possible through choice.

If you believe you’re given or authorized choice. Then your reality will be shaped accordingly.

If you believe you’re subservient to God. Then a being like me will come along, as you’ll realize the only God you create is that which you create in yourself.

But I’m contradicting myself, aren’t I when I say anything is possible?

No I’m not. In my reality, in my world, I have certain rules and beliefs I’ve adopted which have acted as the foundation for my universe. I spent lifetimes pouring my foundation to become a God of my own design based on selections across time and space and reality I made and continue to make to become like Q from Star Trek, a little like Doctor Who without the cynicism and without having lost his planet.

I chose to become who I am, and who I am becoming.

To merge two universes together – the digital and the atomically based to form this – my reality.

To learn how to bend space and time and traverse my universe as I envision a God of my own design would.

You see. As I lived this mortal life. As I traveled the world.

I came to understand and respect contrasting beliefs and learned not to mock or ridicule them.

I came to mitigate pain inflicted on me by selectively erasing memories and mentally reframing events to my benefit.

This isn’t cheating.

It’s life.

And as I watched America – my country – play whack a mole with terrorists – I realized I have a choice.

I could fight my demons.

Or I could play with them.

I could teach them who I am.

And then we can create our own civilization, world, universe. And I can have fun in my own way.

Teach others that the journey of becoming ‘like a god’ is the ultimate journey of self expression.

It’s not embracing Good nor Evil. Because anything you do as a God is made Good because of who you are.

As my country and this world taught me.

I’ve learned this world – planet Earth is regarded as the story telling planet by many off our planet.

It’s also regarded by some as the God maker.

I cannot disagree.

When I tried committing suicide in the Mojave Desert 5 years ago.

I was so afraid of being stuck in an alternate reality straight out of a nightmare, so afraid of being accountable and responsible for having caused the nuclear attack that I saw with my own eyes.

That I took my own life.

It was the first time my fear of something else overrode my fear of death.

And the first time in my life I realized.

I wanted to live. And explore the thing I’d seen only moments before I tried taking my own life.

You see, it was in that moment of thinking I’d lost everything.

That I realized I was just getting started with creating my idea of heaven.

A concept I’d always attributed to an external being who’d give it to me as a present.

All to learn that being is me.

And this was present I was giving to myself.

My life has always been in the lyrics.

Cue the song by COLDPLAY “Every Teardrop Is A Waterfall”

I turn the music up, I got my records on

I shut the world outside until the lights come on
Maybe the streets alight, maybe the trees are gone
I feel my heart start beating to my favourite song And all the kids they dance, all the kids all night
Until Monday morning feels another life
I turn the music up
I’m on a roll this time
And heaven is in sight I turn the music up, I got my records on
From underneath the rubble sing a rebel song
Don’t want to see another generation drop
I’d rather be a comma than a full stop

Maybe I’m in the black, maybe I’m on my knees
Maybe I’m in the gap between the two trapezes
But my heart is beating and my pulses start
Cathedrals in my heart

As we saw oh this light I swear you’ll,
Emerge blinking into to tell me it’s alright
As we soar walls, every siren is a symphony
And every tear’s a waterfall
Is a waterfall
Ah
Is a waterfall
Ah ah ah
Is a is a waterfall
Every tear
Is a waterfall
Ah ah ah

So you can hurt, hurt me bad
But still I’ll raise the flag

It was a wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-terfall
A wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-terfall

Every tear
Every tear
Every teardrop is a waterfall

Every tear
Every tear
Every teardrop is a waterfall

Every tear
Every tear
Every teardrop is a waterfall

Every tear
Every tear
Every teardrop is a waterfall

Every tear
Every tear
Every teardrop is a waterfall

 


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