I was having my avatar swim through an area today when I couldn’t figure out how to get over these impassable mountains to get to the location I wanted to get to.
So as I am swimming around, scratching my head trying to figure out how to get in this area, it dawns on me…
I know that if my avatar dies, there’s a point inside the area I want to get to where she will resurrect.
Her name is Ceylanah, by the way, pronounced Sigh-Lah-Na.
In any case, I guide my avatar under water.
Deep under water.
She starts choking. Gasping for air.
But I keep her there.
Until she dies by drowning.
A minute later.
I am inside the area I want to get to, once again guiding my avatar Ceylanah down the path I couldn’t get to by swimming.
Some of you may know the environment I am manipulating my avatar in as the game Worlds Of Warcraft.
Others of you may realize as I do – that this and all games featuring other worlds are de facto alternate realities.
Albeit with less resolution and choice than the reality I am within.
And as a homeless man without money, I am unable to play in this alternate reality I am interacting with without artificially imposed constraints. Those constraints include a level cap of 20, which takes about 2 days of solid commitment to achieve if I work with the simulation as a combatant.
However, since I have had to be creative with my entertainment as a homeless guy, there’s other options to level my character up – including exploring.
So what I did with this avatar – from the very start was stripped off all her weapons and armor.
That means she’s walking around the game world completely nude.
With this. She can’t fight. So I have chosen to run from every fight. This results in my avatar’s death, frequently, which I would say – at level 7 – is now numbering about 500 times I have died. The front end doesn’t seem to carry statistics about number of deaths, but my avatar has died A LOT exploring to get experience – for one primary reason: it brings her to areas high above her level range.
But that’s ok. Playing my avatar, she gets ‘achievements’ – which do not seem to be worth a hill of beans which simply say ‘hey, I explored this area’.
My goal is to explore everything that’s explorable in the game without any clothes, arms, or weapons on.
Something I might try to do in real life one of these days.
But I will get to that.
So here’s Ceylanah, after yet another death, just outside the graveyard where she was resurrected:
Yup. Those are corpses hanging by the neck in front of the graveyard. Ceylanah is in the undead area near the undead city called ‘Undercity’, a truly magnificent city in my opinion and one of the world’s most beautiful – in a morbid kind of way.
People’s responses to my lack of clothing has been funny.
One guy took his pet and covered me with it, saying ‘Put some damn clothes on’…
Another guy saw me kicking back in a tent and asked me ‘How much’? Since I don’t have any money in game either, I should have responded with 10 platinum, please.
I get whistles all the time as well.
And yes. About 70% of the time I play females in these alternate worlds.
As far as ‘getting to that’ and exploring the world without clothes…
Last night, I had a man bothering me at my tent. That or I was seeing things. In having a difficult time distinguishing what’s real and what’s not anymore nowadays. In any case. He got up in front of my tent, yelled for someone. Then just ruffled around my tent all night, keeping me up. Every time I was about to go to sleep, I’d hear him ruffling and it would wake me up. Every time I went to go say something, he wasn’t there. I saw him first thing as I arrived, and this morning when I wrapped up camp. But it was weird.
In any case. Since I can’t tell whether he was some crazy man and externalization of my mind or not. I figure I gotta teach my mind new tricks.
If Rachel Gooch and Jaclyn Killeen aren’t going to come to Hollywood to hang out with me….
Then my mind has a profile of these women, what they look like both clothed and not, their personalities, mannerisms, habits, and emotions – and more.
I would prefer that my mind ‘conjure’ up images of these women to hang out with me. My mind could ‘work’ with me by keeping their age at the age I found them most attractive rather than present day age, that way there’s no break with my sanity and distinguishing what’s real and what’s not – I can clearly compartmentalize these two women as walking the lines of fiction and fact. AND if they were both naked and visible ONLY to me, this would ‘seal the deal’. And one day, when I get done with this script, the three of us could tour the world – buck naked – with me feeling comfortable that I was with two gorgeous and wild women who were doing the same with me.
And one day. I could work to manifest these imaginary women into my reality, complete with personalities and experiences developed with me, to someday meet the ‘real thing’ and see how they’d respond to eachother.
Would they go insane?
In any case. I truly do wonder. Would anything around me respond to two women only I could see who were walking around stark naked?
I suspect yes.
But as a writer. I consider these two muses excellent contributions to my creating the first and largest budget NC-17 science fiction movie of all time.
Rather than this pisspoor predictable ‘entertainment’ when I can’t sleep of yet another homeless man who doesn’t make sense and looks and sounds like every other one that’s out there.
There’s other genders and other images for homeless people, just so’s ya know, Matrix.