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Why I intend on stealing shoes from Wal-Mart

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I have an MBA.

That’s a Master’s Degree In Business Administration.

Altogether. I have nearly 200 credit hours of undergraduate level college coursework completed in subjects too varied to list.

And altogether, I have officially completed six formal years of education completed past my high school diploma.

Nothing. And I do mean nothing could have prepared me for what it takes to recover from being homeless here in the United States.

Shelters cost $5 a night.

Where’s a homeless person supposed to get a consistent income of $5 a night? Begging, right? Or welfare.

Welfare offices are set up in ways that are there to destroy morale by putting me around a whole group of bottom feeders.

I suppose it’s set up that way to ‘inspire’ you to get off welfare as fast as possible by making an income.

To me. It makes me say ‘fuck this’. I worked my entire life to put money into this country’s economy and this is it’s reward?

I’d rather be on the streets.

So without an income. My shoes are worn. My clothes are getting holes. My underwear and socks have holes in them.

Applying for a job is futile.

Without an address or phone number and only an email for people to contact me, I don’t receive replies.

After sending out thousands, I quit trying.

Take a job flipping burgers?

For what? I have $130,000 in debt. Once my Social Security number gets reported for taxes withheld or my bank account gets anything in it, one of the numerous firms I owe debt to will have my assets seized. Up to and including the IRS.

It’s happened before.

So I can’t have a bank account.

And standing the threat of garnishment of my wages of a low income job – in any city – I won’t be able to make enough money to pay for rent – even sharing rent ANYWHERE I go.

So this leaves only one option:

Under the table income sources.  Paying cash only.

But why? To what end? I’ll never make enough to pay off the debt to get into legitimate lines of work. And I quite frankly have no desire to get into black market activities.

Which still leaves me with a problem:

Holes in my socks and underwear and holes in my shoes.

So what are my real options?

Theft. Steal a pair of shoes.

Steal my clothes.

You know. When I was a child of 8 years old, I pissed my pants when I stole a chocolate bunny because mom said no.

I really don’t like stealing.

But let’s be real: Society’s not handing me any viable options.

My favorite is when people think that they have options. “You should do this and this and this” . These people I just want to bitch slap anymore.

YES this is society’s problem, and I am left to react to it.

What happens when a member of a consumer based society becomes so indebted, they can’t afford their own bills, and subsequently find themselves homeless?

What reasonable methods of recovery does society provide that doesn’t shame you for being in that position?

I got here because i lived my life.

I have no shame for the way I have lived it.

I have learned a lot in the course of this all.

And a lot of things I wouldn’t do again.

SO yes, I have made my fair share of mistakes.

But I can’t change my past.

So as I see it now:

I need new shoes. New clothes altogether.

Goodwill (a non profit that takes donations) and places like that work for profit. I have asked them for clothes, they won’t give to homeless people, they require payment.

The Burbank Center for homeless doesn’t have shoes. I have asked the last several times I have been there.

They have nothing my size (size 10).

What are the police and what is society going to do?

Arrest me?

And YOU consider this incentive? Free food, clothes, bed, a warm shower, and protection from the elements? That’s not exactly a punishment anymore, is it?

What happens when society’s so fucked up, that the punishment for a crime becomes a motivator to commit that crime?

Does society intensify the punishments, becoming more barbaric as is the case with Middle Eastern countries which chop off your limbs?

Don’t steal shoes. I stay on the street.

Steal shoes. I wind up with new shoes.

OR I go to jail where I get shelter.

It’s funny. Theft is a win/win.

And even if it became as barbaric as Middle Eastern nations.

I’d get disability if a limb was cut off.

Which would get me off the streets.

I’m offering ‘society’ the option to present me with a viable alternative to having shoes without holes in them without me having to resort to something I do not like doing: Theft.


I will be stealing a pair of shoes from Wal-Mart in Van Nuys in the next few weeks. I might also pick me up a pair of shorts (40 waist) and socks (Men’s size 10 to 14 – long) in the process.

I’m not even going to be hidden about it.

Walk right in. Walk right out.

There are some things you can blame your actions on others.

I’m placing blame squarely on you, society, for making me resort to theft in order to put clothes on my body.

That is. Unless you prefer seeing me run around butt ass naked.

Which if I dont get the courage up to steal. I may just wind up naked.

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